The TV shows and movies we watch give the public an idea of what dating should look and be like. This gives the public unrealistic standards for dating, which is a bit unfair because no one has the same dating experience as the other. Each individual will go on dates with different people that differ from the others at different points in his or her own life. Everyone experiences similar types of people such as the generic fuck boy/girl or the clingy one, but that individual person will give you a different experience. With that in mind, here are some dating truths I wish I had known freshmen year:
1. Don’t Go In With High Expectations
It’s understandable that you will want to believe that every person you go on a date with will develop into a strong relationship, but it isn’t the case for the majority of the time. That’s why you shouldn’t go in with expectation because otherwise you will just be left disappointed. Although its hard not to, this is one of the dating truths that is important to learn.
2. Don’t Date The First Person You Meet
It’s tempting to latch on to someone you like in the beginning of freshmen year just to know you have someone. In some rare cases, these relationships do work out, but if it didn’t, you will look back three months from now and regret it.
3. You Don’t Have To Have Sex Just Because It’s College
When it comes to dating in college, the pressure to have sex while dating someone increases, but you shouldn’t let that influence your decision. My best advice for this is to go with your gut feeling, but don’t feel like you have to do anything on a date because it’s college. This is one of the most important dating truths to understand! If you don’t want to, you don’t have to!
4. Don’t Expect To Find Your Future Husband/Wife
Some of us might have grown up hearing romantic stories of people getting together in college. I always have the Lily & Marshall story from How I Met Your Mother in the back of my head. However, I have found from personal experiences that it doesn’t help to look for a relationship. Practically all of my relationships in college occurred when I least expected it.
5. If You’re Not Happy, Get Out Of It
It’s common in college for friends in the same friend group to start dating, which can be great! However, it can also put a lot of pressure on the relationship. That being said, no one should feel like he or she has to stay in a relationship. If you’re unhappy, then be honest and tell your significant other. Otherwise, it will make the situation a lot worse.
6. Don’t Feel Left Out If You’re The Only One With An Inactive Love Life
Be assured that not everyone in college has an active love life. Some people their freshmen year want to focus on their studies or want to start out making friends. So don’t freak out or think there is something wrong with you if you are the only one out of your friends who hasn’t gone a date. Trust me, your time will come. This is one of the important dating truths to know, especially if you feel like all your friends are going out and you are not. You’re probably better off, trust me.
7. Don’t Expect Every Relationship To Be Perfect
Relationships aren’t meant to be perfect. They are meant to be full of arguments and disagreements. Honestly, you should be more concerned if there isn’t any of that. Relationships take work, which is something you may have not experienced in high school.
8. Don’t Be Scared To Ditch Your Someone Special From High School
College is a wonderful time in your life where you get to meet new people while you grow and discover more about yourself, and unfortunately your special someone from high school might hold you back from discovering yourself because he or she wants you to stay the same. If this is the case, then please do yourself a favor and end it. You’ll regret it the longer you stay with that person denying you of your capabilities. However, if he or she as well as yourself encourage personal growth, love and care about each other, and want to make it work, then by all means go for it! Just don’t be scared to end it because it isn’t for everyone.
9. Constantly Be On The Lookout for Concerning Behavior
As you continue to date a person, you will discover more about them. That is why you should always be watching for behavior such as aggression, clingy, abusive, addictive, etc. even if you have been dating for a couple months. You never know what will come to the surface as he or she continues to get comfortable with you. This is one of the dating truths that’s extremely important to know!
10. Dating In College Is Really About Figuring Out What You Like
Dating in college is meant to be fun. You will have the chance to go on lots of dates with different people giving you the chance to discover what you truly like in a significant other. As you grow and discover more about yourself in college, you will learn that your taste in men or women will change. With this in mind, my best advice for you when it comes to dating is to go with the flow. You never know what’s going to happen, and if something doesn’t develop into something, great! But if you continue to look and force your dating experience, it won’t be as fun and you might set yourself up for disappointment.