My friends and I have very open relationships, the channels of communication, trust and honesty are so very wide – which is beautiful, and very handy for me in times like this. I asked my friends what their worst sex stories were, and this is what they told me.
Don’t drink and sex, kids.
One of my worst sex stories would have to be this one: myself and this guy had gone back to my flat after a night out and things were going great. We were a little bit tipsy but not over the top so we decided to drink some more since I still had plenty of booze at home. Before we realized we’d finished two bottles of wine on top of the alcohol we had had earlier in the night and things were slightly spinny. We start making out and eventually headed to the bedroom. The sex is going okay but neither of us was really focusing much on what we were doing and nothing was really quite doing it for me so I suggested we change position… In the process, I managed to knee him in the balls causing him to vomit all over the bed due to the amount of booze and pain! He left almost immediately after and I had to clean it all up which was DISGUSTING. Don’t drink and sex, kids.
Slap, slap, no.
My previous partner and I had been together a while and we liked to try new things from time to time to keep things interesting. We were having a really intimate night in together and things start to get toasty. We end up on the floor of our living room having sex which is amazing, to begin with, but then he starts to pull my hair and get a little rougher. In the beginning, I’m enjoying it, and he keeps subtly checking I’m okay without totally ruining the mood – awesome. Then, what seems to me like out of the blue, he (and it really was quite lightly) slaps my face. We both kind of freeze, me in shock and him seeing the expression on my face, and the mood immediately dies. We did not continue and it was supremely awkward until we hugged it out and had a chat once we cleaned ourselves up. Safe to say it’s a move that won’t be repeated again.
Oh, my, pee.
My boyfriend and I were in the early stages of our relationship when this happened, and though it really is one of my worst sex stories ever, we are still together! We had stolen away from a party in our house to have a quickie in the bedroom and things were going sooooo well until I suddenly thought ‘omg I’m going to pee!’. I told my boyfriend this but as our sex was so intense at the time he assured me that that feeling was normal and it meant that I was close to orgasm. Ignoring my own instincts, we carried on and sure enough, what felt like ten seconds later, I launched myself off of him and was suddenly peeing all over the bed uncontrollably. It must have been all of the alcohol… I was absolutely mortified and cried the entire rest of the evening from embarrassment. The absolute angel got me a change of clothes and went and washed all the sheets and remade the bed!!!
Caring about your partner’s pleasure is important.
One of my worst sex stories is more of a particular experience that’s unfortunately been repeated on more than one occasion. The first few sexual relationships I ever had were truly terrible, it seemed like I was dating little boys rather than men, they had no idea what they were doing and no amount of instruction could help. When I say ‘men’, I’m talking about someone who identifies as male and who cares enough about their partner’s pleasure to tailor what they are doing and to not give up when things are difficult. Having now been with multiple partners who can please me fully, I know that it wasn’t ‘just me’ as I had previously been told.