You may think you know your man but let me tell you that you don’t. You might know his favorite beer, his favorite player on his favorite team and the name of his childhood dog (shout out to you, Sadie!). Maybe you’ve even been to his hometown to meet his parents, party with his high school friends and have seen his boyhood bedroom – racecar bed and all. No matter how many late night talks you’ve shared, nothing speaks louder about who he really is than the type of underwear he wears. Sit back and prepare to have your world rocked as I tell you who your boyfriend actually is based on his undies!
Only two types of people wear briefs: twelve-year-old nerds and underwear models. I’m going to assume that none of you are dating the kid from Diary of a Wimpy Kid, so if this is the type of underwear he wears your beau is wearing briefs he’s probably very confident in himself. Maybe a little too confident. He probably spends as much time in the gym as he does looking at himself in the mirror (which is a lot). He’s also pretty happy about what he’s got going on down below because briefs show off his package, unlike any other underwear style. If he’s wearing briefs, your man probably finds nothing wrong with himself physically and it probably shows in his personality.
If your guy is still wearing boxers he probably doesn’t have his shit together. And his boxers must likely reflect that. I bet they have holes all over them, are faded from so many washes (maybe his mom still washes them too!) and are from when he was in high school. He’s also probably laid back and tends to go with the flow. The airy and loose fit of the boxer shows that he doesn’t like control in his life but he means well. If this is the the type of underwear he wears, he just needs someone to come into his life, buy him some new underwear and give him a kick in the butt to get his life together!
This guy is the type you want to marry. He’s graduated from the underwear from his youth and into a more practical pair. That step up reveals that he can take care of himself and he takes pride in his appearance. He doesn’t need to be taken care of and get all the support he needs from his underwear. If this is the type of underwear he wears, make sure to keep him around!
Hopefully, you’re hooking up with a professional athlete if your man wears jockstraps. Otherwise, and I hate to be the one to tell you this, you’re with a stripper. Jockstraps are great for physical activity (of all sorts) which is why they’re perfect for when he’s on the field and on the pole!
A guy who doesn’t wear underwear is always down to clown. This guy doesn’t want to waste any time with unnecessary clothes! He is direct and to the point in every part of life. He will always reply to your text and keep it straight with you. There definitely won’t be a lot of mind games in this relationship. He’s the unicorn of men!
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