When both your best and worst memories are with one person, it can be hard to move on. College is a time when you are truly figuring out who you are. If you find someone you care enough about to share that with, its easy to feel like you will spend the rest of your life with that person. Breaking up with someone that has been there for such a large part of your growth as a person, can feel like you are losing an actual piece of yourself. When it happens, the world feels like it’s falling out from under you. In this moment, you will want to set stuff on fire, or perhaps smash some car windows. In the long run, it’s not worth it. Instead of focusing on him during this breakup, the best advice for how to survive your break-up is to focus on you.
1. Take some time to unwind. Surround yourself with love.
Steal the nasty beer from his frat house and use it to wash your hair, it creates serious shine. Put on your sexiest dress, and get ready to drown in compliments. Go out with your friends, dance with random guys, and drink some pretty cocktails. Give yourself a period of time to let loose and get out of your comfort zone. Don’t think of it as rebounding, but more so grieving the loss of a love you had. Don’t feel ashamed that you’re allowing yourself to have fun because it’s much healthier than allowing yourself to become overwhelmed with sadness.
2. Remind yourself who you are, and why you deserve only the best.
After you have relished in nights of compliments and have been reminded just how hot you are, it’s time to truly start healing. Between the fighting and fighting to save something that was already lost, you ended up losing a little bit of yourself. It’s not something to be ashamed of- it means you were trying to unselfishly hold on to someone. Know that rediscovering yourself is actually really fun and will teach you how to survive your break-up.
Take a little time everyday to do something solely for yourself. Take a long bath or sing at the top of your lungs, even when you come to the red light in your car.
Start remembering who you are, start reminding yourself that you are worthy of love. It’s OK if that love is coming from you.
Eventually, you will start to realize that you don’t need your ex. That you held on so long because you were comfortable and it was easy. Dating someone for so long, that you have envisioned your entire future with them can make it seem like the only future worth having is with them. But that’s not true. You don’t need anyone to be happy. You are in charge of your own happiness, and once you figure that out, you can truly move on and know how to survive your break-up.
3. Leave the past right where it belongs.
The best thing you can do is allow yourself to move on. Just because it’s easy to insta-stalk the girl that you thought was your friend, but is now sleeping with your ex, doesn’t mean you should do it. It’s easy to look at your ex’s “new life” and compare it to what the two of you had. He hasn’t changed for her, and you should never let yourself believe you weren’t worthy of the love he is pretending to shower over someone else.
Delete him. Delete his number. It’s OK to remind yourself that you’re a sexy goddess that any man would be lucky to have. Your ex lost the privilege of being reminded how incredible you are. He doesn’t get to talk to you anymore. Torture him by not letting him to stay in your space. Occupy his mind and time, not the other way around. When your old friend texts you because she “never meant to hurt you,” delete her too. Real friends don’t sleep with your ex. Real friends help you light his sweater that he left at your place on fire while you drink wine.
Inevitably, one day your ex will reach out to see how you are doing. At first you’ll think it’s nice, because enough time has passed that you’ve forgotten why you broke up. You will slowly start to realize that he hasn’t changed and you learned how to survive your break-up. It will be in that moment you’ll fully understand that you have survived a break-up you never thought you would be faced with and you have come out better for it.
Share your advice on how to survive your break-up with your college sweetheart in the comments below!
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Lover of llamas and connoisseur of pickles. I'm a 26 year old living in Denver, just trying to provide a good life for my pug and my pomeranian. I love all things fashion I also have a lot to say about relationships, considering I'm pretty horrible at them.