He’s just not that into you, a statement us girls aren’t too keen on listening to. We always have hope that we’ve got it wrong, that we’ve misread the signs. That he is in fact smitten with you, but just playing it aloof. But this is never the case.
Justin Long sets out some cold hard truths to you in the film He’s Just Not That Into You; if you feel like you’re constantly getting it wrong with guys, then watch this film. You’ll come away understanding more of the signs and that if he acts not into you, he is in fact not into you.
There are plenty of articles telling you the signs to look out for whether he is or isn’t into you, but I’m taking it one step further. I’ll give you some signs to spot if he’s into you or not, but signs can be hard, so I’ve also got 3 tests for you to try to give you a definitive answer.
But first, if he’s into you.
3 Signs He’s Into You
1. Body Language
Look for whether his body is faced towards you as you talk; if his chest is away it’s not a good sign, just as if his feet are pointed away from you. If they are, he isn’t fully invested in your conversation and he is willing to walk away at any point.
When he is into you his body will be turned towards you and his feet will face you. He’ll also be leaning in and making as much eye contact as possible without it being creepy.
2. Brings You In To His Life
If he’s into you, he’ll want you in his life. Fully. That means bringing you into his social circle, showing you all the stuff he likes and dislikes, and generally opening up to you. If he’s willing to introduce you to his friends and show you the nerdy side to him, he’s into you.
While hiding you away means he knows you won’t be around for long and there’s no reason to introduce you to anyone or anything.
3. Compliments More Than Just Your Body
Pay attention to what he compliments. If he’s not into you at all, you won’t get any compliments because they won’t see any of the attractive elements to you. But if they do like you, but only compliment your looks then they are only interested in you for sex. For a casual hook-up.
You’ll hear stuff like: ‘you’re hot’ and ‘you’ve got an amazing figure/ass/boobs’.
But if they’re into you, in a way that could lead to a relationship then you will receive compliments more based around your personality because they have taken the time to pay attention to those traits.
If he gives you compliments more based around how intelligent you are, or that he finds you funny, he is more likely interested in you. He is taking the time to compliment parts of you that take more time to learn about you.
Anyone can tell you that you are hot, but only someone that is into you will tell you you have a gorgeous laugh.
3 Signs He’s Not Into You
1. Only Talks About Himself
You know the rules of a first date, you ask them all the questions to get them chatting. You don’t talk about yourself because it’s not as interesting, you want to learn about them.
But a guy that isn’t interested in you won’t want to listen to you. He won’t bother to ask any questions that get you talking, that will let him get to know you more. He’ll be more interested in talking about himself.
Don’t fool yourself into thinking he likes you if you’re sat across from him bored and listening to him jabber on about pointless stories. He isn’t interested in getting to know you and that is your big sign.
2. You Hang Out On His Schedule
If a guy likes you he will make the effort to see you, whether he’s busy or not. He’ll find a small window to see you because he wants to.
When a guy isn’t interested in you he won’t want to see you unless there’s something you can do for him, there’s a benefit of him seeing you. And he won’t make the effort to see you when it’s good for you, it’ll be on his schedule, when it’s convenient for him.
Be wary of the guy that doesn’t have time for you until it suits him.
3. Doesn’t Make The Effort
If a guy doesn’t call you or text you, he’s not into you. Simple. If he was he would make the effort to text because he’s thinking about you and wants to know how you are doing.
This doesn’t mean he will be messaging you all the time, but he’ll be checking up on you every so often through the day. He’ll message first, 7 out of 10 times most likely. But a guy that isn’t interested doesn’t think about this, you have to reach out to him to be noticed.
This doesn’t just apply to texting, a guy that isn’t interested won’t put the effort into anything. Whether it’s dressing up for date because he wants to look good for you, having a shower, making sure he’s shaved or groomed properly. Even brushing his teeth.
A guy that doesn’t put the effort in, doesn’t want to impress you and therefore isn’t into you.
Test It Yourself
1. Sip Test
The Sip Test is from Fresh Off The Boat, it’s basically a test to see if they’re willing to share a drink/food with you. When they take a sip, pay attention to if they put their lips where yours were or if they pour from a distance, or just chose a different spot to sip from. Or when it’s food, whether they’re willing to use your fork or they use their own.
Someone that’s interested won’t be bothered by sharing germs, they want to kiss you so what difference does it make.
Of course, if they’re a germaphobe then the rule doesn’t exactly apply because they’re more likely to refuse your offer on grounds of germs than because they don’t like you.
Someone that likes you will touch you, that is an obvious statement. So if you want to know whether they like you or not see how often they touch you. How many times they find an excuse to lay a hand on your arm, shoulder or leg.
Someone that likes you will constantly be trying to find an excuse, even just complimenting any jewellery you wear to be able to touch your wrist or collar bone.
This can work the other way round, see how they react to you touching them. If they respond positively, say placing a hand on top of yours, then chances are you have a very interested party.
3. Bad Joke
Bad jokes are awful. How could we ever laugh at a bad joke? But when we like the person telling it we find it hilarious. Or at least we pretend to laugh to make them feel better.
So if you want to test if they’re into you or not, tell an awful joke and see how much they laugh. If they don’t, or just tell you that it was bad aren’t going to be into as much as you’d hope. But someone into you will laugh as if its the best joke they’ve ever heard because they’ll just love the fact you’ve tried to tell them a joke.
It might be a pity laugh but you’ll get a laugh all the same.
So look up some awful jokes and get testing.
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it!