Warning Signs That You are In Codependency Relationship
Codependency relationship is an unpleasant and an unhealthy situation where couples become so emotionally attached to one another that they have difficulties functioning outside of the relationship.
At first glance, being incredibly in love with someone doesn’t sound like an unhealthy codependency relationship pattern.Â
Unfortunately, many codependency relationships have toxic qualities.Â
They are often characterized as being one-sided and dysfunctional. This can lead to a decline in mental health and self-esteem for one or both partners, especially if the relationship comes to an end.
Are you happy and thriving with your partner or do you feel trapped or incapable of leaving your toxic situation?Â
Codependent relationships are more common than you might think. That’s why we’re looking at 5 signs you’re in a codependent relationship and how online marriage courses can help you.
Lacking your own identity
If you are in a codependency relationship, you may feel lost when you are without your spouse.
You may be so used to having them choose what to do, eat, where to go and who to hang out with that you feel absolutely lost when they aren’t around to make decisions for you.
You may also feel alienated from your close friends and family, choosing instead to spend all of your time with your partner. Or perhaps you do not trust your partner and worry about what they would get up to if you weren’t around to watch them.
You make excuses
Have you ever found yourself out with your friends and your spouse suddenly says something rude or degrading? Then you comment, “I’m sorry, he was just in a bad mood today.”
Or perhaps you’ve just gotten into a disagreement with your spouse and they say something purposely hurtful. Privately, you tell yourself, “She’s stressed out at work, I know she doesn’t really mean what she said to me.”
Constantly making excuses for your spouse is another common sign of codependency relationship.
Your life revolves around your spouse
As you have likely heard many times, a healthy relationship is all about give and take. Both partners give loyalty, affection, and time to one another.
Opposite of this healthy cycle, an imbalance of love or affection is incredibly common in codependent relationships. Often times one partner does the bulk of the caring, spoiling, and nurturing while the other reaps the rewards.
This can cause one spouse to feel resentful of their partner for not emotionally “showing up” in the marriage. It can also lead to low self-esteem and other toxic behavior.
Walking on eggshells
One sign of both a codependent and a toxic relationship is if you are so worried about upsetting your partner that you keep quiet about certain topics or behaviors just to avoid arguing with them.
This can make you feel like you are walking on eggshells around your partner all of the time. It can also make you feel as though you are not allowed to have your own opinion.
Taking an online marriage course can help couples learn how to speak to one another in a healthy and respectful manner. This way both partner’s feel loved and validated.
Feeling trapped in the relationship
Not everyone who is in a codependent relationship is oblivious to it. In fact, some people know that they are exhibiting unhealthy behavior or are overly clingy. They may also recognize that their partner has poor habits that can affect their mental, physical, or emotional health.
Even knowing these things, such individuals may feel so attached to their partner that they are willing to stay, or unwilling to leave, the toxic relationship.
A healthy relationship should make you feel safe and loved. You should want to be around your spouse because you love them, not because you’re afraid of being without them.
What to do about a Codependent Relationship
If you have one or more of the symptoms of codependency relationship listed above, let today be the day you make a change.Â
These are three simple ways that you can take back your independence and create a healthy, balanced relationship.
Build communication skills
If you want to have a healthy, functional relationship with your spouse, why not take an online marriage course together?
This convenient form of therapy provides courses on the importance of setting goals as a couple, building intimacy, and most importantly – communicating.
Communication is essential for a healthy relationship. Learn to have your own voice, to speak up when something is bothering you, and to come together as partners and solve the problem at hand.
You can also obtain the service of a marriage therapist to equip yourself with tools to build better communication skills and resolve relationship conflicts.
Do not tolerate abusive behavior
Another great part of the online marriage course is that it teaches partners how to be compassionate.
Being compassionate means both partners are connected on an emotional level. They have empathy for one another.
When your partner has empathy for you, they will do their best not to continue the behavior that hurts you mentally or physically.
Nurture your own desires
If you want to break up with your codependent ways, your first step is going to be practicing self-love.
Rediscover yourself by practicing hobbies that you love and spending quality time with yourself. As your self-love grows, so will your standards. You will no longer want to tolerate abusive behavior in your relationship.
It’s also important to get your social life back on track. While it’s healthy for couples to spend time together, it’s equally important for you to maintain your own social life with friends and family.
Not only will this help you rediscover your personal likes and dislikes, but it also helps you develop a support system outside of your romantic relationship.
Being in a codependent relationship is more than just being overly caring about your spouse. Codependency can lead to toxic behaviors that will leave you feeling lost. Take an online marriage course and learn how to communicate and build goals with your spouse. Doing so will help your relationship feel healthier and balanced.
