Girl bosses. They’re everywhere. Some of the most obvious and hard to miss include the likes of Michelle Obama, Malala Yousafzai, and Sophia Amoruso, who coined the term #girlboss. Emma Watson, Oprah, Serena Williams, Ruth Bader Ginsburg–all of these women embody what it means to be a girl boss. They’re independent, brave, they know what they want and how to get it; they value education, and they support other women. If you’ve ever wanted to see your name on the cover of a book, as the CEO of a company, or written in perfect penmanship on a whiteboard on the first day of school, follow these rules to embrace your own potential toward becoming a kickass girl boss.
The key to being a girl boss is your voice. Being able to use your voice to get what you want and to set boundaries is critical to your own well-being. Whether it’s about a relationship, a friendship, or your career, understanding what your goals are and using your voice to achieve those goals is rule number one. When expressing your needs and setting your boundaries, always keep a calm but serious demeanor; there is always a way to gracefully exert your position and be heard.
You are number one. If you don’t love and care for yourself, you’ll never find happiness in the goals you achieve. Because every achieved goal begins with you. Eat well, exercise, don’t overindulge in the alcohol. Your body will thank you by waking up in the morning ready to take on the day. But your mental health is just as important as your physical health. Take the necessary precautions to ensure a healthy mind as well: yoga, meditation, and the like.
Be confident in yourself and your abilities. If you see value in yourself, others will begin to see it too. It’s easy to get swept up into the social media craze that is taking over our world. We’re constantly being subjected to what the perfect woman is: sexy, smart, a humanitarian, totally hilarious, and mother to four orphaned children, and all of this stuffed into a 24-inch waist. But that isn’t real life. Be confident in everything you are because you’re badass no matter how you compare to the Insta-models of Makebelieveland.
Girl bosses move forward. Mistakes made in the past stay there. Okay, so you lost a job a year ago, and that probably really sucked. But you’re the you now that isn’t going to lose a job, that isn’t going to make the same mistakes you’ve made before. A girl boss is always looking for the opportunity to move forward and she’s focusing on what lies ahead, not what sits behind.
That being said, don’t forget the past. We learn from the past, so it’s important to make mistakes and take the knowledge we’ve learned from said mistakes and apply it to the present. Your past serves as a reminder of what you’re working toward: becoming the best version of you. So learn from it.
It is so easy to get led astray by expectations we have for ourselves when these expectations are based on comparing ourselves to others. Let me break that down. If your friend has just graduated from college and she’s already been offered a kickass job, be happy for her. But don’t get caught in the trap of comparing yourself to her. You’re probably not in the exact same spot as she’s in, and that’s okay. Everyone is on her own path, doing her own thing. Embrace your personal journey, but don’t ruin your own accomplishments by comparing them to others. You’ll be a better friend and a better you.
This one’s easy. Always be listening. You’re going to learn a lot more from listening than you will from gossiping, complaining, or bragging. Not to mention, gossiping and bragging usual point to insecurity.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone into work, and my managers are all sitting around, talking about the wild night they had. Not only is this extremely unprofessional, but how can I take you seriously as a manager if I know how hungover you are. This may seem trivial, but a girl boss knows when to share and when to keep quiet. Remember that social media should never serve as your diary or your therapist. Get a real diary or a real therapist, but refrain from using Snapchat to air all your dirty laundry about the boy you hooked up with who never called you back except to ask you to Venmo him for drinks.
This goes without saying, but always support your fellow girl bosses. Competition is rife among girls, but it shouldn’t be. Instead of spreading hate, spread encouragement and love to every girl you meet. Who knows what her struggle is, what her goals are, what kind of a day she’s having. When we demonstrate love, we become the girl boss we were always meant to become.
One of the most important things you can do as a girl boss is be happy. This encompasses everything on this list: being a good friend, being healthy both physically and mentally, being confident. Being a purveyor of happiness spreads to everyone around you. Happiness is contagious, and it’s the most beautiful thing a girl boss can wear.
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