Welcome to Term 3, the gloomiest term of them all. The vibe around uni seems to sink a bit as people begin to suffer from their purple withdrawals and regret their decision to ‘catch up with work over Easter.’
Well, not to worry. I’ve composed a list of the best places to cry at University of Warwick Coventry when you just can’t anymore. Remember everyone, crying is not a sign of weakness. Get it out your system, let those tears flow and sob loud to cover up the sounds of colossal shits hitting the toilet as people over-caffeinate.
1. Under a Desk on Floor 2 of the Library
The constant buzz of noise will mask any of your sniffs and whimpers and no one will care that you’re under a desk because they’re too busy chatting to their mates and laughing excessively loud so the whole floor feels like they’re in on the joke.
2. The Arts Centre
Already filled with performance and theatre, if you start crying in the Arts Centre, no one will be able to tell if you’re rehearsing for a show or crying for personal reasons. For all they know, you could be an aspiring thespian committed to the role and not a poor student whose social life is hanging by a thread.
The picturesque scenes at Lakeside offer a dramatic and cinematic crying sesh. You can stand on the bridge, overlooking the lake and just let it all out. The squawk of the resident geese will be sure to cover your cries.
4. The Stairs in the Library
If you’re on a silent floor and can’t climb under the desk, don’t fret! Make a quick dash to the stairs. This location works particularly well if you take a friend with you, where you can mutually cry or they can offer gentle words of reassurance. There’s plenty of room to hug it out next to strangers who are facetiming their mums.
5. An Oculus Lecture Theatre
If you’re looking for great acoustics, you should defo come here. The sounds of your cries will bounce off the walls and echo so you can appreciate what you really sound like when you cry. It’s recommended that you wait until the theatre has been vacated but if you feel it coming mid-lecture, let it out and maybe you’ll start a Mexican wave of people crying in allegiance with you.
Settle-down in Costa and let your tears drip into your coffee. Everyone in there looks a bit moody anyway so you’ll fit right in. You can get a cheeky treat to help you stress-eat the pain away or order a Chai Latte to get you back to your chill Zen.
7. That extension of the Piazza no-one sits on
Most suitable for those who just need a bit of space. While everyone else sits on the Piazza with an Eddie’s ice cream, you can sit alone on one of those benches way on the other side and distract yourself from your troubles by wondering what on earth those sculptures are supposed to be.
8. The Lifts in Humanities
Get in the lift, hit floor 5 and stare at yourself in the mirror as you slowly ascend. Look at who you really are. Give yourself a pep talk. You will rise just as this lift is rising. Your marks will get higher just as this lift does. Wipe your tears away. You have totally got this. Now get the lift back down because ain’t nobody got time for those stairs.
9. At the Bus Interchange
Another location that can be quite cinematic; standing outside, your tears merge with the raindrops as they trickle down your face, onto your buss pass. Are you crying because you’re stressed? Are you crying because the U1 hasn’t turned up and it’s been an hour and you know that guy is totally going to shove you out the way when the bus does come? It’s a mystery.
10. Any toilet cubicle (Engineering or Library Floor 3 extension recommended)
The classic. It’s private and secluded and there are ample provisions to wipe your face and blow your nose. Just have a bit of me-time. Don’t worry if you take ages in there because people will just assume you had one too many energy drinks and needed to release your bowels from their peril.