Tinder For Dummies

Tinder. Yes I am talking about that 6-letter word that either makes you nervously giggle in half discomfort and half shamelessness or just makes you roll your eyes because you strongly believe in meeting people on life’s clock…until you actually download it. Whether its curiosity about how it works or you’re just over replaying the “meeting my dream guy/girl in [scenario of preference]” scene in your head, Tinder can be, well, a bunch of things.

Tinder doesn’t have official rules.

You simply swipe left or right and if messages go according to what you are looking for then you meet up with this individual. However, because there are no “rules” either party can message first, say whatever they want whether it’s appropriate or not, ask of you information that has to be disclosed to your best judgment, and so on. The following is pretty much a break down of what we go through as girls on Tinder.

Downloading Tinder is kind of a rush.

It’s like our conscience saying, “Wow are you really going to do this? This is a new low” but then another part of you encourages by saying, “Do it! You have nothing to lose! Plus he may be the one“. So post-conscience argument you just download Tinder because “if it’s too weird or not my thing I can just delete it” right? Plus, you give yourself that bonus fact that online ‘dating’ is the new trend!

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So now you’re in.

There are simple directions: swipe left if you’re not digging the candidate or swipe right if this person is a potential catch – then you wait for him/her to think the same of you and match! To be honest it’s a confidence boost when that semi-transparent black screen surprises you with “It’s a Match!”.

But it’s not all about the amount of matches you have sometimes. These people’s profiles can be super amusing or just uniquely..um..different or just boring and to the point. Before you know it you are spending half your day swinging your thumb back and forth; it happens to everyone, even to the best of us.

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Messaging

If and when you stop going through these people’s pictures and reading their bios, messaging steps into the court. To me, this is when you really start making memories. These guys/girls may have the best conversations starters or simply give you the “I’m not really worthy of a reply” sign. Either way it’s Tinder! Have fun with it but also watch what you say; the Tinder community has already hopped on the “Basic Vocabulary” bus heading to “Sexual Innuendos” Central.  Things will go from 0 to 100 real quick or real slow, it just depends on the person you are and the person you are getting to know. Obviously you don’t reply to everyone but if you do, you go girl! Keep your options open but be smart and safe about it.

Meeting people from Tinder is entirely up to you.

Speaking from experience it can be kind of strange knowing that you chose this person because of their appearance/bio/ability to keep up a conversation or whatever reason on an app! All these thoughts rush to your head as you’re driving to meet this person. In the end it’s probably not as bad as you thought, however, these people may not look like they do on their pictures because they were younger or you just don’t connect with them. You can always come up with an excuse and leave.

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The real post-meeting question:

Did Tinder do its job? Regardless of the answer, you tried it out! Perhaps this person is now your significant other, hook up buddy, a cool friend, or someone you will never contact again!

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This concept of choosing who we want to match with based on physiognomy is convenient but also a misrepresentation. It’s a plus because you decide who you want to have a chance with or just go through their shirtless pics. It’s a downer at the same time though because what if this person is super awesome but you just can’t know all their cool features based on a few pictures and simple bio? One will never know.

This new era of dating has several pros and cons. Nonetheless, having an app like Tinder can be entertaining and a gateway to free food and activities. Just be smart and trust your gut. Later you’ll look back at it and laugh uncomfortably or triumphantly – either make good stories!