The 16 Hot Pocket Types And How Good They Actually Are

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Here is a ranking of all the hot pocket types. We've got you covered from BBQ Beef to Cheeseburger and Philly Cheese steak. Here's your hot pocket 411.

Hot Pockets; they mean different things to different people: late-night snack, quick breakfast or just gross. Chances are you’ve eaten one once before. There’s literally no chance you could get sick of these things since there are 16 different hot pocket types. To some that might seem a bit disgusting, even worrisome, but thankfully I’ve got the Hot Pocket 411.

Thanks to Thrillist foodie, Andy Kryza, who stocked his freezer with all 16 Hot Pocket flavors, we’ve got ourselves a pocket ranking. Next time you’re at the grocery store and are unsure of which ones to get, refer back to this Hot Pocket ranking. Starting with the best and working our way down to the worst, prep yourselves:

1. Cheddar Cheese Melt with Pretzel Bread.

Image result for Cheddar Cheese Melt with Pretzel Bread hot pocket

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2. Ham & Cheese with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust.

Not gonna lie, I’ve had this one and I despise it; probably because I hate ham. I can remember I was at my friend Brenna’s house in 6th grade and that’s when I was first introduced to hot-pockets. Haven’t touched one since, so thankfully we’ve got Andy Kryza here to give us the low-down.

Image result for Ham & Cheese with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust. hot pocket

3. Pepperoni Pizza with Crispy Crust.

I could get down with this.

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4. Philly Steak & Cheese with Seasoned Crust.

I could also get down with this.

Image result for Philly Steak & Cheese with Seasoned Crust. hot pocket

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5. Four Cheese Pizza with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

This is making me question if I should give Hot Pockets another go.

Image result for four Cheese Pizza with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

6. Chicken Bacon Cheddar Cheese Melt with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust.

Never mind, I retract my last statement.

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Image result for Chicken Bacon Cheddar Cheese Melt with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust

7. Steak & Cheddar with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

Not feeling this one. Does that mean there are only four Hot Pockets I could get down with out of the 16?

Image result for Steak & Cheddar with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

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8. Four Meat & Four Cheese Pizza with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

Why do all these have garlic buttery seasoned crust?

Image result for 8. Four Meat & Four Cheese Pizza with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

9. Chicken, Broccoli & Cheddar with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust.

I dunno, I think I could get down with this one. Is that gross?

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Image result for Chicken, Broccoli & Cheddar with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust.

10. Pepperoni Pizza with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

This is playing it safe, I can dig it.

Image result for pepperoni pizza hot pocket

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11. Five Cheese Pizza with Crispy Crust.

Why are all the ones I’d definitely try on the bottom of his list?

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Image result for 11. Five Cheese Pizza with Crispy Crust.

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12. Pepperoni & Sausage Pizza with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

Okay, this one seems like it’s ranked properly.

Image result for 12. Pepperoni & Sausage Pizza with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

13. Meatball and Mozzarella with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

How the fuck do you stuff a meatball into a Hot Pocket? Big no-no. I want the real deal.

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Image result for 13. Meatball and Mozzarella with Garlic Buttery Seasoned Crust.

14. Cheeseburger with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust.

No. Especially after reading that you can taste ketchup in is. No.

Image result for 14. Cheeseburger with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust hot pocket

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15. Beef Taco with Seasoned Crust.

Don’t ruin tacos for me, there’s a reason your are second to last on the list.

Image result for Beef Taco with Seasoned Crust hot pocket

16. BBQ Recipe Beef with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust.

BBQ beef is a no-go for me. BBQ chicken, maybe.

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Image result for BBQ Recipe Beef with Crispy Buttery Seasoned Crust.

There you have it Society19 babes; a complete ranking of Hot Pockets and all they have to offer. Which ones have you tried. Let us know in the comments below!
Featured Image Source: weheartit.com