How To Spot A Stoner
A stoner is classified as someone who partakes in the smoking of marijuana, and you can not just simply tell if someone smokes just by looking at them. However, there are a few things that may lead you to believe someone smokes. That is why we made this list of ways for you to spot a stoner!
Rid Yourself Of Your Dated Marijuana Beliefs
You may not smoke marijuana, and maybe you even hold some strong beliefs about the substance. While your beliefs are your beliefs, you should also know that there really are no negatives to the substance itself. It does not make people lazy, it does not lead people into becoming drug addicts, and no it does not make a stoner a dumb person. People have been using the substance since the beginning of time, and a stoner is no different behaving than someone who has never smoked once in their life. Literally, anyone can be a stoner.
Do You Think They Smoke?
Just look at them and ask yourself if you think they smoke, whatever answer your gut tells you is most likely correct. I mean, probably about half of all people are potheads, so you have a 50/50 chance of being wrong.
Repetition
Some stoners will repeat themselves multiple times and not even realize it. That short term memory loss is a dead give away.
Check The Eyes
One of the first giveaways is in the eyes. Obviously, if they are really red like they got soap in them, yeah they are a stoner. Also if they are squinting more than a normal amount, almost look they are smiling with their eyes. Their pupils will not be dilated or anything like that, but they may not react as quickly to things. Also, anyone who just carries around regular eye drops for no medical reason is a certified stoner.
That Smell
This should be a dead giveaway, but if that person reeks of marijuana, they are a stoner. If you are not aware of what marijuana smells like, imagine a better-smelling skunk. Not to mention the smoke smell that sticks to clothes. If it smells extra smokey though, they may just be a cigarette smoker, so you should keep checking other things.
Music / Movie Connoisseur
A hefty majority of potheads will talk with you forever about either music, movies, or any other medium with artistic expression. They might discuss the best and worst albums, the scariest horror movies, or tell you all the things wrong with the Star Wars movies. There are some rules that are typically an automatic sign of a weed smoker. Such as if they really like Radiohead, or if they know what the movie “Enter The Void” is.
Check The Bottom Of Their Lighter
I am going to let you in a stoner secret. People who choose to smoke their marijuana out of a glass bowl tend to use the bottom of their lighter to push the weed down. So, check the bottom of their lighter for burn marks and residue. Also, I know people lose lighters often but if they have dozens of lighters laying around, they might be more apt to smoke.
420!
Here is a way to try and weed it out of them. Make a small reference to the number 420, and see how they react. If they immediately repeat 420 at a higher volume than you, it may be safe to assume you are in the presence of a stoner. April 20th is considered national weed day, so 4/20 is like pothead Christmas. Some people will make the 420 references and not smoke weed, but those people typically want to give off the impression that they do smoke.
Other Slang
There are several other terms that may be in the stoners vocabulary. Dank, chronic, bud, blunt, puff, toke, and ganja are just the words I can think of at the moment. Focus on how they react when these words are brought up naturally. A pothead’s brain will connect the said word to marijuana use in a heartbeat, so see how they react. Also, only a stoner will unironically say the word “Dank”.
“Smoke What?”
Here is another simple way to find a stoner. Ask that person if they smoke, and if their response is “Smoke What?”, then the chances are this person is a stoner. A cigarette smoker will automatically assume you mean cigarettes, and they will probably just think you need to borrow a lighter. A stoner will want that verbal confirmation of what you are asking if they smoke. Either way, you will get your answer this way.
Repetition
Some stoners will repeat themselves multiple times and not even realize it. That short term memory loss is a dead give away.
Stoner Stereotypes
To be honest, there is not one sure-fire stereotype that every smoker has. However, there are a few that some stoners will exuberate. That hemp knit sweater is one thing, and also anybody wearing marijuana-related and hemp apparel. Also, super giggly people who laugh even when nothing funny is happening. In fact, those people are probably high at that moment. Also, one thing that bugs me is the people who will act like they worship Bob Marley and talk about him constantly, but know nothing of his work other than the fact he smoked weed.
Just Ask!
Literally, just ask that person if they smoke weed. At the very worst, they say no… and that is all. They are not going to get you arrested for talking about weed, they won’t think any differently about you, so just ask them already. In hindsight, this should have been the first tip.
Stoners are usually pretty cool people, so do not be afraid to just openly ask them if they smoke. Also, for the love of God, remember that stoners are just regular people who love plants. Did I forget any obvious ways to spot a stoner? If I did, make sure to let me know in the comments!
