A Poem: A Survivor Of Sexual Abuse

I am a girl who has been taken advantage of on more than one account. Physically, emotionally, mentally. I am a girl who has spent countless hours screaming out in hopes that someone might hear me. I sometimes find it hard to leave bed – and it’s not that I wish I was dead; for my mother always told me that I am a shining star. Rather, it’s being stuck existing inside my own head. I am a girl who flinches at any unknown touch. I am tired of fighting.

Kids will often whine and cry if they don’t get what they want, but I, I tremble and weep because I received a haunting tale that I did not want, one that I will always carry with me. It is not a matter of ‘somebody always has it worse.’ It is a matter of a huge issue that has no meaning to this world. It is angry, sad, sorrowful. It is something I never could have imagined. Boys will NOT just be boys. I fear the men and women that let this chilling phrase slip out of their mouths: they are one of them.

I often wonder ‘why me’. But this is not how I should be viewing my trauma. It did not stunt my growth, for it made me stronger. I wouldn’t love as wholly as I do. I am not praising my trauma. I am acknowledging it, accepting it. After all, it is a part of me, and I would not be who I am had life’s map been different. Running from my trauma does not make it real.

See Also

What It Is Like To Be The First Child To Attend College In Your Family

I am more than a month-long one night stand. I am more than the lack of consent that was present that night. I am more than instant regret and constant fear. I am not the girl who was molested, raped or the like. I am more than my trauma. But I am no more or less of a person because of it. I am Samantha, I am a Scorpio, I am open-hearted, I am a writer and a lover. I am strong willed. I love learning. I am a survivor.