Empowerment. That word is used a lot at the moment and its usage is a step in the right direction. Gone are the days when a random hookup got women a label like ‘slut’ whilst men got ‘stud’. 2018 is the year of the “time’s up” and “me-too” movements, both of which speak of female empowerment and taking back control. Both call time on men (and other women) disrespecting women, hurting women and taking away our voice. We have our voice back and we can use it however we want.
Sex is fun and there is nothing to be ashamed of by enjoying it. A man could find a woman in a club and brag about his prowess to his friends. So why can’t you? If you see that lad or lady, the one from your lecture who always wears those jeans that you like, in a bar go and talk to them! You don’t have to plan your wedding and babies, just have fun and see where it leads!
You could try new positions, toys or even flirt with other genders to discover more about yourself. With casual sex, it is much easier to try new things than when you’re in a relationship as there is no awkwardness linked to commitment. A random hookup should be seen as an opportunity for exploration!
Of course, with this empowerment does have to come weariness. We are not out of the woods yet and student areas are rife with crime and sex related crimes are still happening regularly. Vigilance and safety are also key, making sure a friend knows where you’re going. Perhaps sharing your location, sending safety texts and making sure your phone is charged so you can always get home again. If you do feel like you are in trouble then tell someone, tell your date that you’re uncomfortable and remove yourself from the situation.
Part of the emotional connections linked to sex come from your own emotional state, you have to be feeling right and feeling like you want to. These situations only work if you are both in the same mind-set and you have trust. Obviously, trusting someone you’ve just met is never going to be easy but without it you might not be at ease. Us women have been responsible for so long, isn’t it now time to be a be a little bit irresponsible? To have fun? Just remember fitty mcgee’s jeans and you could be off for a wonderful, unforgettable night. Stay vigilant, stay confident.
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