Ever wondered if your best friend is really your ride or die or just another toxic friend? Does she know what you like to order from McDonald’s? Is she willing to drive to your house in the middle of the night with a pint of your favorite ice cream to listen to you cry over another failed Tinder relationship? Do you guys have a contingency plan to live together as life partners if you’re not married by 30? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then your BFF might be a true ride or die. Here’s our list of ways to really find out the truth about your best friend.
A big way to know if your BFF is really your ride or die is to look at whether she listens to your song suggestions and watches your favorite movies. That’s not to say she has to like everything you do – liking different things can be a great way to find out more about each other. But if your best friend isn’t willing to let you have the aux cord or pick the movie for movie night, then she might not be a real ride or die.
Support in friendships is super important, and you should always surround yourself with people who support the things you like, even if those things aren’t for them. And your support team should be led by your BFF.
A true ride or die will be the first to gas you up when you’re looking fire, and the first to compliment you when you need a little extra confidence. Is she the first to comment on your newest Instagram selfies with the little fire emojis? Does she tell you you’re killing it when you go out in a new dress?
If your best friend isn’t gassing you up every chance she can, then she may not be a true bestie. Although the same stands for you – are you gassing your girl up whenever you can? If the answer is yes, then you’re definitely a true friend and worth keeping around.
Is your bestie a good listener? If so, then she’s for sure a ride or die. It’s so important to keep friends in your life that take the time to listen to what you have to say, especially if it’s something that’s emotionally weighing on you. Whether or not they can actually help you, having a friend that is willing to listen to you is so important for any friendship.
It’s also important that they understand what kind of listening you need. Do you need advice listening or just rant listening? Do you need help, or do you just have stuff that you need to get off your chest? Having a best friend that knows what kind of listening you need can be one of the most beneficial friendships you’ll ever have.
I’m sorry, but if your BFF isn’t willing to fight someone for you, then she’s not a true ride or die. Whether it’s the girl in your Econ class who was talking about you behind your back, the boyfriend that dumped you before your birthday, or your mom, your best friend should be the first one to come to your aid when you need her. She should be the knight to your queen and vice versa.
Personally, my best friend is a non-confrontational teddy bear. But when I say she was willing to slash some tires after my breakup, I mean that she was willing to SLASH some tires after my breakup. And it was having someone so willing to fight for me that made me feel so much better about my situation.
Okay, this may sound like a weird one, but a true ride or die will know what you want to order from your favorite restaurants. Whether it’s Chick-Fil-A, Cookout, McDonald’s, or iHop, your BFF should know what kind of food you like to order. Extra points for best friends that will bring you your favorite foods after a bad day, and extra points if she knows your drink and sauce order.
Next time you take your bestie out to eat, see if she can order for you. Then see if you can order for her! You’ll be surprised to find that, if she really is your best friend for life, she’s probably got your order close to perfect.
A real ride or die isn’t just there for the big problems–she’s there for the little moments, too. Does she tie your hair up for you when you’re too drunk to do it yourself? Does she sit with you in the bathroom because you didn’t want to go alone (bonus if she brings your drink)? Does she take that package to the post office because you can’t get off work in time to mail it?
Friendship isn’t made just with the people who show up in the middle of the night (although we love them, too). A true friend does the little things, and eventually, all the little things stack together to create one amazing person who you couldn’t live without.
Okay, so she doesn’t have to be a Virgo (although, speaking as someone with a Virgo for a best friend, they make great besties), but a ride or die is someone compatible with you. Not necessarily astrologically, but look at whether you have similar personalities or like the same things. Do people comment on how you’re basically the same person? Do you sometimes think you’re basically the same person?
Compatibility is incredibly important to any friendship–you’re going to enjoy yourself more with someone who has similarities to you, so make sure your bestie is someone that makes you think “Wow, we might be two sides of the same coin.”
While being there for the big stuff isn’t always the only decider for a ride or die, it is still incredibly important. Is your best friend someone you can call ate at night because you need a friend? Is she someone that could trust to drive you to have surgery if you’d be too out of it to drive home? Your best friend should be someone you could call whenever, wherever, and she would do her best to be there for you if she can.
Your ride or die shouldn’t only be willing to fight FOR you, she should also be willing (and able) to fight you. Let’s be honest – we’re not perfect people all of the time. To grow and become better versions of ourselves, we need to have someone who can call us out and tell us when we’re wrong. But it’s also important that this be done in a productive way–you can’t just yell and cuss at someone and believe that will create a positive change.
Your bestie needs to know you well enough to know when to fight you and how to fight you in a way that you can understand and grow from. They also have to be willing to make up with you when it’s over so that you can continue being boss babes together.
Okay, listen, did you drink water today? Did you really? And I mean water–not coffee, not Gatorade, but WATER. No? Go drink some. And a true best friend would say the same thing. They will care about your well-being, both physically and mentally, and will do their best to help you reach your peak form.
Now, they shouldn’t have to be your mother–just remember to drink water sometimes–but they should be willing to care for you the same way you are willing to care for them. Your relationship should be an equivalent exchange where both parties are making sure everyone has had some water today.
Remember how a true ride or die would be supportive of your music and movies? Well, they should also be supportive of your interests and life goals. If you like hiking outdoors, they should be willing to come with you sometimes–even if it’s not their thing. On the same note, if you wake up one day and decide you want to be a traveling illustrator, your bestie should be the biggest cheerleader on your court.
Your best friend shouldn’t be someone who puts down your dreams–instead, she should be someone who pushes you to reach those goals. Your BFF should be someone you can call and say “I want to go raise koalas,” and she’ll reply “That sounds amazing! Let’s do it!”
Here’s the most important question to consider when asking “Is my BFF really my ride or die?”: is she basically your girlfriend in all ways but romantic? Now think about it: Does she know everything about you? Is she someone you are more comfortable with than anyone else? Does she cuddle with you or take silly pictures or do all the things you’d do with your S.O., but without all the kissing and so on?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, then yes, she is a true ride or die. Bonus points if you two have a plan to move in together as platonic life partners if neither of you is married by 35. Personally, my best friend and I are planning to find a cottage in Maine to raise our cats and plant a large garden. Always find a best friend who is willing to be your platonic life partner–because for me, if you become my best friend, you’re stuck with me for life.