Relationships can be extremely difficult and at times trying. Trust and communication are the two ultimate factors that you need to have to establish a healthy relationship. If you don’t have solid communication and untarnished trust in your spouse then the relationship can all come crashing down. In all honesty a relationship without trust is not a relationship worth staying in. These are some of the signs to look out for in a relationship without trust.
Trust by definition means ‘firm belief in the reliability, truth or ability of a person or thing’, in other words, having complete confidence in a person and their intentions with you. Trust allows you feel open in communication, comfortable in expressing your personality, reassured despite any obstacles and secure in your role in your partner’s life. Professor Frances Frei describes trust as ‘the foundation for everything we do’ so without trust it is almost impossible to progress as a couple if it is tarnished.
In order to know whether you have that trust in your relationship and to build on tarnished trust. You need to understand these components which build trust within relationships to begin with.
Is your partner truthful with you? There’s nothing worse than hearing a false story from your partner and then hearing the full story from somewhere else. Honesty is all about inclusivity through complete openness in conversation and not leaving anything out or lying.
Do you feel like your spouse takes responsibility for their actions? If your relationship is a constant debate of you trying to make them understand where they’ve gone wrong in their actions towards you or anyone else, then there’s honestly no point.
Do you feel like you mutually have each other’s best interest at heart? In a relationship it is important that both individuals are working towards building the relationship in a positive direction and building each other to become better people.
Do you feel like you can depend on your what your spouse says they’re going to do? If you constantly feel your partner is not meeting your expectation because they constantly make false promises and never show out, then this can tarnish your trust. This is one of the signs to look out for in a relationship without trust.
All together if you feel you have none of the components above in your relationship, then it is right to assume that you do not have trust within your relationship and without trust there is no relationship. Constantly feeling on edge physically and emotionally because you are unsure of the intentions and reliability of your partner, is not a relationship worth staying in and is an extremely toxic and unhealthy situation that is not good for your mental health.
You should never sacrifice your standards or feel as though your feelings are invalid with the person you are in a relationship with. If they respected you enough as a person, they would fully commit to you and develop your trust by keeping to certain boundaries. When a person continues treat someone with such lack of respect the love in the relationship is lost as the only thing keeping you together is comfortability and a toxic connection and there is no way that as a couple you will be able to develop or progress in a positive direction.
If you feel like your relationship includes most of the above components, but you may be lacking in a few, then you may have the opportunity to build trust and strengthen your relationship before deciding on whether it is worth staying. This is one of the signs to look out for in a relationship without trust.
The first step to rebuilding trust is to admit mistakes. Taking responsibility for where you or your partner may have gone wrong in the relationship and sincerely apologising for causing any, is definitely necessary to move forward in the relationship.
After taking responsibility, it is important to understand the consequences of actions and how these action may affect your partner and the dynamics of the relationship. Understanding why the hurt partner may feel different or act differently towards the other is important in this scenario and constant reassurance is needed to build back that trust. This is one of the signs to look out for in a relationship without trust.
Of course, there is no question that the trust of your partner must never be broken again and the same mistake must never be repeated. It has to be genuine and authentic or it will never work.
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