Having sex isn’t as fun when you always come in second place. But that doesn’t always have to be the case. There are so many reasons why you are not having an orgasm when you have sex, and hopefully, with a few minor changes, you will be getting jiggy with it and having one every time. Obviously, for girls it is a lot harder to have an orgasm than boys, but it doesn’t mean that girls can’t ever have one. You can win the gold nearly every time with these amazing tips which will leave you saying yes.
Of course, women take longer to achieve an orgasm than men do, but through a wonderful thing women have on their bodies, it feels oh so good! It is nearly impossible to orgasm in sex without clitoral stimulation. If you or your partner do not know what or where the clitoris is on a female, I suggest you find out.
One of the keys to this is to know what you like and don’t like. Things will turn you off a lot quicker than they will turn you on, so you need to know what is good for you. Tell your partner (or show them) how you like it and you should be on your way. This can, of course, be during sex or any type of foreplay. Hands, tongue, whatever works for you. But you shouldn’t be missing out because you don’t know what to do – educate yourself, touch yourself – it is the best way to learn!
It is all well and good introducing clitoral stimulation into the mix, but without finding a position which helps you along a little you might find it slightly harder to have an orgasm. When having sex, experiment what feels good and what doesn’t feel as nice to you. It will boost how you feel and you will feel more likely and ready to reach climax.
If you are at an angle it will reach the right points in your body to help you. Some girls like to be on top and some girls can do it in whatever position they are in (lucky them, right?) but practice makes perfect and the best way to reach an orgasm is to practice, practice, practice. Your partner will be loving it.
Being drunk dulls your nerves and your senses so the feeling of touch and the sexual chemistry between you both won’t be as pure. It may relax you a little bit more and make you a bit more creative, but you won’t be more likely to have an orgasm. If you feel like you cannot have sex without a bit of dutch courage, make yourself feel more comfortable by doing things to relax you and get out of your own head. You will thank us for this one.
Being comfortable when you are having sex is a key thing you need in order to have an orgasm. The reality of you having an orgasm when you are folded up like a pretzel or you have a huge leg cramp is really slim. Your body and mind need to focus on what it is doing and you need to be involved in the moment. Try experimenting with the position and do simple things that you feel comfortable doing and you will be more likely to have an orgasm.
Also, if you don’t feel comfortable in your body, this can be a huge thing to affect your orgasm ability. You need to love yourself. If you feel self-conscious in any way – do something to help you. Shave, wear some sexy lingerie, wear a t-shirt if you have to. But don’t feel like you aren’t sexy. The biggest thing to having an orgasm is to get out of your head and if you are constantly worried about something or too stressed you will suffer.
This may sound extremely obvious, but relaxing is the key to having an orgasm during sex. If you are thinking about what to have for dinner or what assignments you have due this week, you are not feeling the sexual vibes. You really need to get into it and let your body absorb everything that is going on in the moment. Relaxing your mind also means relaxing your body. There is no point being all tense like you are about to get an injection. The more you relax and enjoy the sex the more likely you are to be relaxed and therefore have an orgasm.
If all the above fails, it may be time to take a naughty little trip to Ann Summers. Finding a clitoral simulator doesn’t need to be embarrassing or daunting. Most women will try using a sex toy once in their life. You can try alone or you can use it during sex or foreplay with your partner. If you are alone, make yourself comfortable and turn yourself on. If you are with a partner make sure you ask before you try it – it may harm their ego a little bit if you whip out a vibrator unexpectedly.
You can buy something fairly small and appropriate for you if you are uncomfortable with the idea of what you see in trashy teen films. But not all sex toys are like that, of course, if that is what you want then go for it! Everyone is different and what will work for you won’t always work for other people.
You could also try something called an orgasm gel, which is essentially a lube which gets all your nerve endings going by cooling and warming temperatures and will stimulate your clitoris in a way you never thought possible. It won’t work on its own but it may speed up the process a little bit and help you along the way.