Most people will experience at least one fake friendship during their lifetime. Whether it’s at school, university or even at work, some people just aren’t what they seem. Keeping up a relationship with a fake friend can lead to a toxic environment and completely drain you. It’s always important to pay attention to certain friends’ habits if you’re concerned. Here are 8 signs showing a possible fake friend.
1. They only talk about themselves.
Fake friends only care about themselves. They put their needs before anyone else’s and you’ll find that they won’t be there to answer your call when you need them. They’ll boast about their achievements and weigh you down with their problems. But when it comes to helping you back, they just can’t be bothered. Every conversation turns back to them.
2. They only go out when it suits them.
When they want to go somewhere but not be alone, that’s when you’ll get the phone call. You can bet they’ve already asked others but you’re the last option. If you ask them out, chances are the answer is ‘no’ unless it’s what they want to do.
3. They always make promises they never keep.
Fake people always want to look good in front of others. They act like they don’t care but they’re actually very self-conscious and want others to think highly of them. To help their own image, they’ll make promises but never see them through. Whether it’s big or small, they’ll disappear when it comes to doing whatever it is they promised.
4. They make you feel guilty for not seeing them.
Even though they don’t care about seeing you unless it suits them, they’ll always make you feel terrible when you bail on them. They’ll use it against you anytime you want to change plans or say ‘no’. One of their biggest weapons is the guilt-trip. It’s an easy way to manipulate you into doing what they want. Everyone has a life outside of their friends’. People work, go to university, have more than one friendship group, you can’t please everyone. A true friend understands this and will be patient.
5. They expect you to drop everything for them but never return the favour.
When you need them, are they nowhere to be seen? To be blunt, they’re a fake friend, they just don’t care. They’ll be hostile if you don’t drop everything for them, but when it comes to returning the favour, their life is more important. You can’t rely or depend upon fake friends, they don’t provide any support at all.
6. They can be passive-aggressive.
Passive-aggressiveness can be used alongside the guilt-trip method. They’ll provide back-handed compliments, use subtle insults whilst pretending it’s all “just a joke”. This creates a toxic environment and, in simple terms, make you feel like utter shit. You don’t have to put up with it.
7. They behave differently around certain people.
They pretend they want to please everyone and become chameleons around different people. They’ll create personas to seem appealing and reliable. Don’t trust this. If you notice someone changing their personality around others, just ask yourself, “Well, do I really know who they are?”
8. They have a nasty habit of gossiping.
Gossiping should be left at school. It’s immature and there’s just no need. Be honest with yourself, if you’ve heard them gossiping about people, then they’re probably gossiping about you too. Real friends are honest and air out their issues, they don’t go behind people’s backs.
9. They always expect compliments but can’t take criticism.
They usually seem like they love themselves and want you to compliment them on anything and everything. But any criticism and you’ll see their mood instantly change. Constructive criticism is helpful and honest, good friends will know how to tell you something without making you feel bad about yourself. Fake friends can’t take it and will lash out immediately.
10. They make you feel terrible.
The biggest thing you should ask yourself if you suspect someone of being fake is: how do they make you feel? If you leave their company feeling drained, beaten down or just plain terrible, then that should be a big enough sign. Real friends are there to help and support you, not make you feel worse or belittle you.