For those of you who go to bed hungry after a night out because you’re too lazy/ too scared/ too inebriated to cook- the following is a set of quick late night meals guaranteed to satisfy your cravings without waking up the rest of your college!
What you’ll need:
Assuming you’ve made your weekly/ fortnightly trip to Tesco’s, crack an egg into a microwavable mug. Whisk it with a tablespoon of milk, salt, pepper, and garlic powder. If you’re feeling especially adventurous, add some crushed Doritos to this mixture and microwave it for 91 seconds. Stop the timer at 90 seconds to avoid having a showdown with your flatmates the following morning.
red ToastButte
What you’ll need:
At college, my toaster was often filled with things that weren’t bread-based foods. If your toaster is working, go ahead and make some toast and eat it with heaps of butter as one of your quick late night meals. There is nothing better than salted butter at 3am. But if you’re like me, and have flatmates who are very creative in storing their lecture notes, you can microwave bread to make toast. Place a slice of bread on a paper towel and microwave it for 30 seconds. Check its texture after 29 seconds, if it’s still soft- put it back in for another 30 but on the other side. Spread some Nutella on your toast to make your dreams sweet.
What you’ll need:
For when your microwave is not working, try using a kettle instead. Use it to boil water for tea, hot chocolate or instant noodles. Alternatively, dump your noodles into the kettle (without the garnishing) and boil it. It may make you very unpopular with your flatmates, but will make for a delicious meal at 3am. The tricky bit is to get the noodles out of the kettle. Use a sieve or hold a bowl near the spout of the kettle to catch any noodles as the water drains into the sink. Add the garnishing to the noodles. For that extra crunch, keep a strand of noodle aside and crush it on top of the rest at the end. Make sure the kettle is cleared of any noodles.
*Alternatively, just make Pot Noodles (#NotSponsored)*
What you’ll need:
Chocolate “apparently” makes your hangover worse but that has *literally* never stopped me from making chocolate cake after a Lloyds Wednesday/ Sunday Night Klute/ Loft Monday/ Friday Night Jimmy’s. And I do mean literally. Here’s how you can follow my slow descent into diabetes: fill a ¼ of a mug with flour. To it, add 2 tablespoons of sugar, an egg, a spoon of oil and milk. Stir it until a smooth (ish) mixture is formed. Then, add your favourite chocolate spread (or peanut butter). Microwave for 119 seconds (or until you see the cake rise). Add some whipped cream on top for that Gordon Ramsey level finesse. Alternatively, you could just eat some whipped cream and call it a night.
What you’ll need:
A wise person once said: “the best sandwiches are made when drunk” (Google it). Ham sandwiches are for the sixth form you, the one who thought drinking a VK Ice was cool. Now, you’re at university and it is time for you to *glow* up- we’re leaving basics in 2k17. Get on our level, b. Anyhoo, stock up your fridge with pasta sauce (pesto if you’re really trendy), pepperoni, basil and cheddar. Add all of those in appropriate proportions to the microwaved toast and microwave once again to get the best pizza sandwich ever. I, however, am prejudiced towards a simple grilled cheese. There is nothing sexier than biting into a grilled cheese and tugging the strings of cheese oozing out of the golden-brown toast. I like my grilled cheese with Cheddar, Parmesan and Red Leicester. As I’ve said to my doctor; “I’m here for a good time, not a long time” and the results from my blood test concurred.
All of these quick late night meals assume that you’re sober enough to see and walk. If you’re not in the mood to handle hot things, stock up on hummus and crisps/ Ryvita thins/ baby carrots. Not only is it a healthy snack, but its guaranteed to make you regret your life’s decisions to the point of total sobriety. Why eat healthy now while your metabolism is at its peak? Give it something to work on whilst it’s still young. Give it [insert chocolate brand name] cereal. Chop up some [insert chocolate brand name] and add it to a bowl with some cold milk. Milk is supposed to be really good for hangovers as it rehydrates your system and the has most of the vitamins that are lost from the body during the consumption of alcohol. Start of the day the right way with [insert chocolate brand name] cereal.
You can never go wrong with frozen pizza as one of your quick late night meals!
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