Romantic- comedies and fairy tales have conditioned us to believe that being single is a negative experience. At family gatherings, our elderly relatives constantly ask us if we’re still single; then give us a pitying look when we say yes. Having been single for the last year, I can honestly say it has been cathartic, instead of distressing. There’s no need to explain your behaviour to anyone. So why does everyone treat being single like it’s a life sentence? I say embrace your inner Bridget Jones and get to know yourself without the pressure of someone else’s expectations. Below, details how you can embrace your singleness like I have!
Being single means you spend a lot of time on your own. This gives you time to think through everything and I do mean everything! You can debate poignant questions such as Who am I? What do I want in life? You have no boy to distract you, giving you the perfect opportunity to focus on yourself? Being single is the perfect time for self-evaluation. If you don’t like yourself then why not change it? I began by focussing on career goals and here I am writing this article. It can happen. You can achieve anything you want. Let your singleness push you towards your goals. By knowing who you are and what you want, you will be a more driven and confident person.
When you’re single, you don’t have to continuously consider someone else’s emotions. Which would often have stopped you from doing things you really want to do. In my past relationship, I pushed myself to meet his friends and tried to like what he liked, but I never felt like it was fully reciprocated. This bred frustration on my part and ultimately led to a breakdown in communication. By stopping doing the things I really wanted to do, I lost a part of myself.
Yet by being single, I have worked towards my goals. I have traveled more, become a better cook and focussed on writing. Something I haven’t done in what seems like forever. Maybe you want to climb a mountain or complete a world book record or maybe you have much humbler goals. The point is you can do literally any of these things.
You no longer have to check if your schedule lines up with your significant other. You are free and single and your time is yours and only yours. You don’t have to wait for someone finishing work to hit the beach. You don’t have to check that they are free for drinks with your friends, instead, you can go on your own. By only worrying about your schedule you become a lot more organised and reliable. I love the fact that I can just take off when I want if I desire.
Its no secret, people become comfortable in relationships. Nobody cares about a couple extra pounds when they’re in a stable relationship. Your partner has to accept you as they love you no matter what. Yet when you become single, it’s like you want to become the best version of yourself. In January, I succumbed to the pressure of joining a gym and in April, I found myself quitting said membership. This being said when I was exercising daily I was full of energy and felt confident in my body again. It’s amazing even if I wasn’t seeing physical changes, I was definitely feeling the mental ones.
Endorphins are magical. By working out, I actually found myself working things out and poking holes in what I thought was an amazing relationship. I now know it was infatuation, not love. Having been single for a while I can honestly say working on my goals and my body has made me love myself more than before. Therefore, if you embrace your singleness and work on yourself, you will 100 percent reap the rewards!
When you get into a new relationship, it is easy to forget the people who have been there all along. Your friends. When you become single, every one of your friends will be there. Regardless, of whether you have neglected them. Don’t get me wrong, being in a relationship is great but it’s even better being with your friends. There’s nothing heavy, they can’t get too mad if you forget plans. So get all your friends together and have a pamper session. Or even better have a night out on the town. Dancing with your favourite girls is the best way to embrace your singleness. Being single is about being happy with yourself and your life. This is a sure-fire way to welcome your new status.
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