57 Things You Wish You Could Say To Your Roommate


Going away to college or even moving out for the first time is always exciting. You get the chance to meet so many new people while enjoying the freedom of being away from parents. My freshman year of college was pretty scary, but thrilling in many ways. I met some pretty interesting people, like my roommate: an international student from China. Living with her was definitely an experience I will never forget. If you’re lucky enough to have a roommate that you get along with 24/7, never let them go. If you two have some differences, sometimes it might be best to hold your tongue. Here is a list of 25 things we wish we could’ve said to our roommates but could never find the courage.

This is a collaborative piece by: Imani Nooks and Lindsey Dixon

1. “No, you can’t borrow my clothes.”

Thankfully I’ve never had a roommate who thought it was okay to borrow my clothes, but many of my friends have. It’s creepy to walk into your room and see your roommate wearing the shirt you just bought last week. We may be roommates, but we don’t have to share everything.

2. “Do you ever stop talking?”

Sometimes it’s nice to have someone to talk to when you see a funny video on Instagram and just want to share it with someone. However, it gets annoying when it’s 2 a.m. and you’re finally going to sleep after putting the final touches on your paper and your roommate decides to ask you for life advice. You just want to ask your roommate to shut up, but then that might bring up some tension that you’ll have to live with for the rest of the semester.

3. “I’m really tired of you and your guest you invite over unannounced.”

After a long day it’s great to unwind in your room alone, but if you have a roommate who is friends with the entire campus, relaxing is nearly impossible. It gets annoying when your roommate shows up with a new friend in your room every day. Sometimes they don’t understand the concept of boundaries.

4. “Please don’t get naked in front of me!”

This is a real thing. Being comfortable with your body is great, but if it makes the other person uncomfortable, that’s taking it a little too far. You don’t live alone, so please don’t get naked in front of me.

5. “I was really looking forward to some time alone.”

After a big test or even a midterm it’s great to relax in your room and even watch some Netflix. If you’re roommate never leaves the room and loves to talk, you begin to feel like an intruder in your own room.

6. “We don’t need to go everywhere together.”

When your roommate wants to go everywhere with you it begins to feel more like you’re being stuck with your younger sibling and less like you’re out living on your own. They want to go everywhere with you because you’re awesome… can you really blame them?

7. “Why do you take so long in the bathroom?”

When you have a roommate who takes years in the bathroom on the day you wake up late for your 8 a.m. class, try to keep your composure. What’s even worse is when they take long and come out looking exactly the same.

8. “You decided to take that 8 a.m. class, not me.”

I’ve never taken an 8 a.m. class, but after hearing stories of friends who have, I’d like to keep it that way. When your roommate is loud and wakes you up it begins to feel like you decided to take that 8 a.m. class also. They seem to not have a care in the world while they’re getting ready for class.

9. “Why are you up watching TV while I’m trying to sleep?”

TV’s are great but sometimes people just don’t know when to stop watching. 4 am is not a good time to be watching TV while your roommate tries to sleep. Then when your roommate asks you why you’re so tired, make sure you give them the death stare.

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10. “Your presence is distracting me.”

It’s hard to find a private place to yourself when you have a roommate. Sometimes you’re just having one of those days when you want to be left alone and it’s impossible when your roommate is there. You want to tell them to leave but you can’t because you both share the room.

11. “Why must you play your horrible music while I’m studying?”

Sometimes you’re unlucky and you get a roommate with the complete opposite taste in music. It’s nearly impossible to study when your roommate is playing music that you absolutely hate. Now you have to resort to going to the library to study.

12. “Do you know what a broom is?”

Sometimes I wonder how it’s possible for someone to not know how to clean up after themselves. They see your side of the room is clean and they chose to keep their side filthy. You just want to yell at them to clean up after themselves. You can’t even invite your friends over because of them.

13. “Why must you go in my refrigerator and take my food?”

In college we’re allowed to have a small fridge to keep whatever you want cold and fresh. Sometimes roommates think it’s okay to go into your fridge and take your food. If you wanted orange juice, you could’ve went grocery shopping.

14. “I hate when you bring your boyfriend over when you know I’m single.”

They want to bring their boyfriend over and you end up being the third wheel or feeling awkward in your own room. You can’t really kick them out because they’re paying for this room too.

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15. “If you’re going to cook at least clean up after yourself.”

No one wants to do the dishes especially if they’re not the one who did the cooking. It’s nasty to leave dishes in the sink for days. No one wants to be the reason why there’s bugs in the room.

16. “Don’t talk to our other roommates about me.”

No one likes confrontation, but it’s best not to talk about your issues with one roommate to another roommate. If you have a roommate like this, it’s best to solve the problem right away.

17. “Don’t leave weird notes when you want to talk to me.”

It’s kind of creepy when you find weird notes in places you wouldn’t expect. If you have a roommate who’s a little on the creepy side, you never really know what to say to these types of things.

18. “Don’t lay on my bed when I’m not there.”

This is extremely creepy because who knows what else they do when you’re not there. They have their own bed and decide to lay on yours. Ew.

19. “If you wanted to see your parents every day, you should’ve stayed home.”

It’s fine to feel homesick every now and then, but what’s the point of leaving home when your parents are there every day? You don’t get to experience true college life if your parents are with you 24/7.

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20. “Turn off the light when you clearly see me trying to sleep.”

Sometimes you can’t go to sleep when you have a paper due and you’ve decided to wait last minute to do it. You can’t let your roommates suffer for your irresponsibility. There’s a lounge and a library, so it’s best to choose one instead of waking everyone else up.

21. “You could clean the bathroom every once in a while.”

It’s unfair to have to tell them when to clean. Especially if you two share the bathroom. Maybe it’s time to create a cleaning schedule. You would think it wouldn’t have to come to this.

Sometimes you have to remind your roommate to clean.

22. “If you finish the toilet paper, refill it.”

They use all the toilet paper and still expect you to refill it every time. Everything changes when you move out. The toilet paper roll isn’t going to fill itself.

23. “You don’t live with your parent anymore. Clean up.”

It gets really smelly and nasty when you don’t clean. Not every college is going to have a janitor to clean up your room. In my college we had to clean our own rooms. It’s hard when you live with more than one person because they think their parents are still going to clean for them.

24. “Do you ever go to class?”

They’re always in the room when you leave and get back from class. You never see this person studying or even cracking open a book. Sometimes it makes you wonder how people like that have made it this far.

25. “I’m not your alarm clock. Wake yourself up!”

You can barely get yourself up in the morning and they want you to wake them up too. Sometimes people can be really inconsiderate. Not everyone grew up the same way you did.

26. “You really need to shower.”

Being “busy” with five classes and sorority meetings every other day isn’t a reason to stink all the time. Showering is important and necessary.

27. “Your side smells.”

The combination of dirty and laundry and old garbage is a bad combination and its been smelling for days.

28. “Cleaning your side really isn’t that hard.”

I’ll even provide the broom and dust pan if you’ll just tidy up so I don’t have to keep looking at the eye sore that is your half of the room.

29. “You’re allowed to take out the trash sometimes.”

Just because I do it doesn’t mean you can’t. I’m just too OCD to let the can overflow as much as you do.

30. “Laundry isn’t really optional.”

Wearing the same leggings five days in a row is gross and they’re starting to sag. If we have free laundry in the building you should really use it.

31. “Take a cough drop or shut up.”

Your coughing all night really doesn’t make it easy for me to sleep. I have an 8 am and am not friendly without sleep.

32. “Your midnight snacks are loud and unnecessary.”

Eating chips in bed at 2 in the morning isn’t healthy and disrupts my sleep. Like I said before I am not friendly without sleep.

33. “Please don’t turn every light on at 2 am.”

Just because you come stumbling in from the bar in the middle of the night doesn’t mean it’s okay to turn all of the nights on. Other people live here you know.

34. “You could at least tell me when your friends are coming over.”

It would be nice if I didn’t have to worry about random strangers walking into my room when you aren’t here to borrow a shirt.

35. “Get a keychain.”

Because I am not here to let you into the room all the time. Buy a keychain, put your key on it, and stop forgetting to take it.

36. “I am not your personal chauffeur.”

Yes, I understand I’m the only one with a car but that doesn’t mean I’m here to drive you on your every whim. I have my own life.

37. “At least ask before you take.”

I don’t mind sharing stuff with you but I would like you to ask first and not just assume.

38. “Going to class is necessary.”

I know you like to sleep in but you should go to class every once in awhile.

39. “GPA does matter.”

Even though it seems like grades don’t matter now you will regret not trying a few years from now. Maybe you should not go out and stay home and study occasionally.

40. “You should start your homework before 10 pm.”

Forgetting the fact that it annoys the heck out of me when I’m trying to sleep, late at night is not the best time to do homework. Especially when you quit trying ten minutes later.

41. “It’s not healthy to spend all weekend in bed.”

I know its cozy and you’re tired but you really should get up every once in awhile. Even if it’s just to eat something and then you go back.

42. “Maybe you should buy groceries other than alcohol.”

Yes, our mini fridge doesn’t fit much but your half should have at least one food item. Alcohol is not it’s own food group and shouldn’t be an entire diet.

43. “You really need to eat something other than junk food.”

When you do consume something other than alcohol maybe you should try something a little healthier than Doritos. At least try one other food group.

44. “Your sorority isn’t your whole life.”

I know it may seem like it now but later you won’t even remember that random date party on a Tuesday night before your big test. Spending all of your time with these girls who you just complain about may not be worth it in the long run.

45. “You don’t need every date party t-shirt.”

I know you’re trying to remember the “good times” but those t shirts will eventually be thrown all over the bottom of your closet. Most of them aren’t cute and the memories won’t matter after graduation.

46. “Maybe you should stop taking advantage of your parent’s money.”

This goes with buying all of the party shirts. Sure they pay your tuition and don’t complain about buying everything else but eventually it’s time to stand on your own. Start simple by not abusing the privilege by buying every thing you kind of like. It’ll feel good to be independent.

47. “Going out every night isn’t good for you.”

I know right now it seems fun and you want the “college experience” but sometimes a night of rest without alcohol can be the best thing for a body. It’s always good to take just one night off and recharge.

48. “You’ll survive a night in.”

There will always be another party and missing this one won’t be the end of the world. Taking some time for yourself. You never know you might like it.

49. “But don’t complain about being in all night.”

If you do choose to stay in I don’t want to hear all about how you’re going to regret it and that you’re missing everything. Make a choice and stick with it. Keep the complaining to a minimum please.

50. “You shouldn’t wear that out.”

I know you’re never supposed to say it but yes it does make you look fat. Not everything looks good on everyone and you will regret it when you see the pictures.

51. “No, the frat does not think being a groupie is cute.”

Hanging out there every night is desperate and they do notice. It is not appealing to them it’s annoying.

52. “It’s not endearing to know every pledge’s name.”

Especially when you aren’t a freshman yourself.

53. “They make fun of you when you black out.”

I know you laugh about it in the morning, but they laugh about it when it happens. They aren’t concerned for you they’re amused by you.

 

54. “I don’t enjoy those awkward conversations with your one night stands.”

And I don’t appreciate being kept out of my own room so you can get lucky.

55. “He’s just not that into you.”

That one-night stand was just that. No he’s not going to call and probably won’t even remember who you are next time you run into him at a party.

56. “You’re driving me crazy.”

I can’t wait for this year to end because sharing a room with you is making me insane.

57. “You’re the worst.”

I hate you and your annoying habits.

Featured image source: Odyssey


Alexandra Smith
Alexandra Smith

Alexandra Smith is majoring in Psychology, with a minor in Creative Writing. In her free time, she enjoys running, hanging out with family friends, and roaming the world with her camera in hand.

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