Friendships are some of the most wonderful relationships that can happen in our lives. Finding someone you can really connect with and be yourself around is more than a blessing, and often makes your best friend feel like blood. Sadly, many friendships, no matter how many years they have lasted, can fall apart. One day you can be telling each other your deepest secrets, gossiping about love interests, and planning a road trip together, then suddenly, you can’t seem to recognize each other anymore. It won’t be an easy thing to accept, but once you realize it, you can be better prepared for the emotional turmoil that will naturally follow. Here are five things to consider when a friendship falls apart.
1. It’s okay to stop trying
After you’ve tried everything you can to fix your friendship, there will come a time when you have to realize you can’t keep trying to call them anymore. They no longer text you all night, they no longer seek you out the way you do. It does not mean that you are boring to them now, it just might be time to start letting go little by little and communicating less is usually the first stage to happen when a friendship falls apart.
2. The loneliness will hurt, but you will heal
Not talking to your best friend as much anymore will seem strange, but not seeing them as often as you used to will definitely hurt. It will be the kind of pain that you think will never end but you need to remember that it will get easier and you will heal from that broken relationship one day. Don’t focus on the things you could have done differently or what you guys would usually be doing now. Focus on ways to take care of yourself and give time to your other friends who are surely worried about you.
3. Always remember the good times
Friendships, especially the endearing ones, will be the hard ones to forget no matter how much you try. So don’t try to forget the wonderful memories and keep them in your heart to look back on every now and then. Remember the silly traditions you shared, the nights you snuck out together, and the way you always had each other’s backs. The smiles and laughter, the small gifts you gave each other, and all those photos are special, they will be the light you need during dark days. Rather than dwelling on the past, remember the friendship the way it was before it ended.
4. Don’t try to replace them
Sometimes, when something important suddenly leaves your life, you try to fill that missing piece with something else, something better. But try to understand that you could never replace your ex-friend because as much as you may resent them now, they were once a big part of your life. Trying to find a new best friend to take their place will only make the emotional pain worse. Feeling like you need new people in your life is a perfectly normal response, as long as you remember that they have their own personalities to offer, so don’t spend time comparing them.
5. You are good enough.. and so are they
So they finally walked out of your life for good and the only chance that you will have of seeing them again will be as a stranger on the streets. Remember that you did not fail them as a friend, and consider that they didn’t fail you either, things just changed as they inevitably do beyond our understanding. Be grateful that they entered your life for the amount of time they did and smile at the memories you both created. You will both move on and make new friends, but what you once had will always be a sweet chapter in both your lives.