First dates can be nerve-wracking — especially since they involve a whole new person. If you haven’t been on one in a long time – or haven’t been on one altogether – then you may find yourself feeling even more anxious and unsure of what to do. Fortunately, these 10 things to avoid when going on your first date will help you better prepare!
1. Try And Avoid Talking About Your Ex
The person that you’re accompanying is there to learn about you; in turn, the last thing that you want to do is cause them to shy away. Not only that, but this could cause them to feel as though they have wasted their time – because to them it appears as though you’re still hung up on your ex. Consequently, this can be perceived as rude or degrading in the eyes of the other person. But even so, this can be avoided by being mindful of your dating habits; in other words, if you’re not ready to get back into the dating world just yet then don’t be afraid to kindly decline their offer.
2. Don’t Be Someone You’re Not
One of the worst things that you can do is find yourself wrapped up in your own lie as a result of trying to pretend to be someone that you’re not. In fact, you’ll find that it’s a lot more work trying to fake it to make a lasting impression on the other person. Fortunately, this can be avoided by being yourself — which requires no finishing touches. After all, if you have to make yourself appear more glamorous in the eyes of that person, then it may not be a healthy pursuit in the first place.
3. Don’t Overdo It
If you aren’t big on a pantsuit — or heels — then don’t feel obligated to wear them. Of course, you’re going to want to dress for the occasion, but don’t let that deter you from being comfortable. Just be sure that your wardrobe reflects your personality – without trying so hard to fit the other person’s image of you. All in all, if you like to dress more casual. then you can do just that by enhancing your look ever so slightly to fit the event.
4. Don’t Be Afraid Of Silence
When there are breaks within your conversation, don’t cause this to make you feel anxious. In fact, the other person might just be in careful contemplation of what to say next. Consequently, many see this as the other person losing interest – or not enjoying the date as much as them – when it is oftentimes the exact opposite. This just shows that they are listening – so instead of trying to rid the room of silence, embrace it.
5. Try To Release Any First Date Jitters
Many of us have experienced first date jitters at least one time in our lives. Don’t let them keep you from having fun. In fact, you’ll find that it’s best to release them prior to the date so that you aren’t forced to be uncomfortable for the rest of the night. Fortunately, by doing this, you are able to relieve yourself of any tension that you might feel making for a much more enjoyable experience.
6. Make Sure That You Smell Good
When nerves get the best of you, you’ll find that something else is sure to follow — sweat. Fortunately, by bringing travel-sized deodorant, and/or perfume, on the go, you can easily freshen up no matter your locale. Just make sure that you try and keep perspiration at bay — as much as possible — so that you can feel both comfortable and confident.
7. Be A Good Listener
Are you spacing out, or looking off into the distance? If so, this a big thing that you want to avoid when going on your first date; it can come off as rude, and make you seem as though you’re disinterested in the person in front of you. Not only that, but you don’t want to cut them off either because it may cause them to go quiet all together — eventually ruining your date in the long run.
8. Avoid Being Obsessive
If you’re a person who lets your guard down easily, or one who struggles with falling for people all too quickly, then you’ll want to avoid coming off as too obsessive. This poses a risk if the person is someone who’s very talkative, and easy to relate to – or connect with. Consequently, this may cause you to feel drawn to them – or to get your hopes up. In turn, you want to be sure to avoid claiming them as yours and instead look at the date as an intro to the possibility of something more.
9. Avoid Talking About Past Relationships
Do not — I repeat — do not mention your past relationships; in doing so, you’ll find yourself comparing those fails to the person sitting across from you. This may cause them to feel uncomfortable, and make them feel as though you still have things to work on. Fortunately, this can be avoided altogether, and shouldn’t be discussed in the presence of a first date — unless they ask a question related to such sensitive information.
10. Avoid Treating Your Date Like A Therapist
The two of you are there to enjoy each other’s company, so the last thing that you want to do is spill all of your problems onto them. They didn’t bring you out so that they could counsel you; they brought you out so that they could get to know you. Not only that, but if you pour all of this onto them it can come off as negative, and completely shift their mood.