The perception of women involved in the college hookup scene is nothing but an unfortunate double standard. A girl who enjoys hooking up with people and embraces their sexuality, regardless of their reasons, is branded as a “slut,” “whore,” “thot” and other derogatory terms due to her “promiscuity.”
However, a girl who does not actively participate or clearly states her boundaries upfront with someone before it gets too hot and heavy is called a “prude” or a “tease.” So, how does someone who wants to enjoy casual hookups (or avoid them completely) do so without the judgment or name-calling from others? Here are a few tips.
Be aware of your situation.
When you begin hooking up with someone, you need to fully understand your relationship with that person. If you have the hopes that this hookup will turn into a relationship down the road, it’s time to pause and take a step back. You need to gauge if this person feels the same way, or if they are only in it for the short term. If they are only interested in hooking up, chances are they aren’t the best romantic fit for you. Make sure you are both on the same page, this will avoid any feelings being hurt in the future.
Keep it on the down low.
Keeping your hookups to yourself and not heavily flirting with someone for the whole world to see are good ways to avoid being labelled. If somebody asks you about it, say, “I don’t feel comfortable talking about that” or “I’d rather keep my private life to myself.” It can be hard keeping a hookup a secret, but hey, nobody can label you if they don’t know about it, right? Plus, it adds a sense of allure to your life. Who doesn’t love a good mystery? 😉
In life, there will always be people who will judge you. Whether it’s based on a first impression or by something you said or did, it is inevitable. Being called a slut or a whore is unpleasant, but you control how words affect you. I know it is easier said than done, but ignoring other people’s rude comments can save your confidence. Haters gonna hate, ladies.
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Brook Caldwell is a student at Dartmouth College. She likes to play music, bake, and make people laugh.