Stop Trying To Make Your Random Hook Up Fall In Love With You

Random hook ups are meant to be casual with no strings attached. But, being human, you catch feelings. Here is how to deal with a hook up you've fallen for.

There aren’t many things that are better than a hook up with no strings attached. It is fun and available whenever you want it without the immense pressure of being in an actual relationship. The problem is, we crave the attention that dating brings and being intimate with another individual can bring in those annoying things called feelings that we try so hard to suppress. Sometimes random hook ups can lead to a relationship and that’s great, but forcing it can ruin a good thing and if you can’t keep your feelings out of it, you may have to take yourself out.

Is it the hook up or the feeling of a hook up?

Ask yourself if you really do have feelings for him or if you just like the way he makes you feel when you hook up. Hooking up and having someone who wants to hook up with you can often make you feel beautiful and loved. It could be that you are attached to this feeling rather than him.

With a relationship comes commitment.

Despite what you may think, that commitment can be hard at a time when you are still learning to become your own person. You and your hookup have one thing in common, you turn each other on. Go with it, and if you outgrow each other then it will be easy to let it go rather than having to end a relationship where one or both parties could get hurt.

Go for it, but don’t get your hopes up.

If you really have fallen for your hookup then attempt a date, have an adult conversation with him and ask him if he feels the same. If he says “no” or “I’m not sure” end it then and there because there are so many other guys, and so many other random hookups to experience for that matter, and why waste your precious time and energy on someone that doesn’t know how they feel about you? All this will do is hold you back and you deserve better.

Have you had this experience with a hook up!? Share how you handled it in the comments below!

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8 years ago

Hannah Bingham

Hannah Bingham is a first-year student at Penn State University and staff writer for Society19 at Penn State. Hannah is majoring in print journalism and is expected to graduate May of 2021. If you see her on campus she will most likely be holding Starbucks and planning her next outfit to post on her fashion Instagram which you can follow@pinkrosesbrowncurls or her personal @hannahh.bingham.