Sometimes you need a break from drinking every weekend but at the same time you still want to go out with your friends because #FOMO sucks. Here are the 17 steps of being sober at a party.
1. The decision
So you’re going to take a night off from drinking for once but still want to go out with your friends… this is going to be interesting
2. The pre pregame
You, your roommate and a few close friends are starting to down shots while finishing hair and makeup. So far so good, listening to good music and surrounded by pretty much sober friends the night is turning out to be pretty good so far.
3. The pre-game
More drunk people start to surround you as the pregame gets into full swing. You are starting to feel more left out since you are most likely the only sober one in the room.
4. Ordering the Uber
Drunk friends start to yell about when to leave and what the address of whatever house you are going to is. So you take it upon yourself to order it, but obviously make sure everyone splits the cost of it with you
5. The ride over
One of your friends has to ask the driver if they have an aux and of course they do so everyone is singing along to the song playing at an obnoxiously loud level. Making sure to take snapchats of all of your friends who are trying to sing the correct words but are simply failing at making sense.
Arriving to the party with everyone in your squad without dying is a small victory. Climbing out of the car you apologize to the driver for being so loud and gather you friends to go into the party.
7. The party scene
Looking around before going in, you realize that you’re in a really sketchy location that no right minded person would go to if not extremely drunk.
8. Walking in
Walking into the party you go into full mom mood. Keeping tabs on all of your friends as we enter into the dark and crowded room.
9. Is it always so hot in here?
A few minutes into the party you become very aware of how much you are sweating and instantly regret wearing pants.
At this point in the night you may be regretting not drinking because it really isn’t that fun when all of your friends are drunk and having fun while you’re sober and realizing that these parties aren’t that fun without drinking at least a little something.
11. Trying to talk to drunk people
Trying to have a semi intelligent conversation with a drunk person is almost impossible between word slurs and the overall noise surrounding you.
12. Trying to stop your drunk AF friends from texting their Exs
Screaming at your friends to give you their phone as they try to get away from you is always a good time.
13. The screw it stage
Being sober at a party is overrated so you go grab a beer cause technically one beer won’t get you drunk and you will still be sober at the party.
14. Finally having enough of the party scene for the night
Since you are the most sober of the group, clearly you get to decide when everyone is leaving.
15. Gathering up your friends
Hopefully by now your friends have stared to sober up, making trying to find them and leave altogether an easy task. Although there is always some friend that is still super out of it and yells at you when you try to pull her away from the guy she’s calling her “soulmate.”
16. Finally getting back to the dorms
Getting back to school has never felt this good.
Climbing into bed and being able to finally going to sleep is the best feeling ever. Looking back on the night you are reminded to NEVER try and have a sober night out again.