Society has finally been able to create a label for the relationships we have that don’t quite count as relationships, but still feel pretty close—the “almost relationship”. Despite the label, we still have a hard time differentiating between whether or not this is occurring with the person we’re trying to be with. It’s good to have signs so that when it is happening, you can get out of it quickly. Here are 10 signs that you may be in an almost relationship.
1. Neither of you knows what you want
This is crucial in any relationship. If you or the other person you are dating start off by saying “I don’t know what I’m looking for”, then most likely it’s going to turn into an almost relationships. People who end up in committed relationships are usually ready to commit. If this person doesn’t know what they want from you, then they aren’t going to put in the effort it takes to get you.
2. You both are playing games
In an almost relationship, there is a lot of game playing. This means there’s a lot of dating other people, waiting a couple days to respond back or acting like you’re bust when you’re not. An almost relationship is filled with a lot of maybes. Maybe we’ll see each other, but maybe not. If you or the person you’re dating is making the relationship seem loose ended, then it definitely is.
3. There’s a lack of communication
When in an almost relationship, you don’t keep in contact much. Sure, when you’re together it can be special and life-altering. This person you’re seeing can make you feel amazing when you’re with them, but if they feel distant when you’re not together—then you aren’t together. The lack of communication is actually communication and it’s saying that you two aren’t going to end up together.
4. You are seeing other people
When you’re ready to commit to someone, you’re not looking for others. Whether you really like this person or not, there’s a reason you’re looking elsewhere. Deep down, you know that there’s probably someone else out there that’s better for you. Maybe they aren’t fulfilling all of your needs and despite you not wanting to admit it, you probably deserve more. Maybe you should be looking for someone else because they’re most likely not able to give it to you anyway.
5. They make you feel like you’re not enough
Not only are you looking for more, but it seems like they are too. If there’s ever a moment when they make you feel less than what you are, you probably aren’t the right fit for them. They may love so many things about you, but that doesn’t mean you’re the right fit. They may subconsciously be making you feel less because they want you to be more. They want things to work, but in the end, it won’t.
6. You don’t create a friendship
Throughout the time that you date, it seems like it’s only that. It’s easy to go out for dinner, for drinks or to spend the night watching Netflix and having sex, but when it comes to actually bonding, it becomes difficult. You are stuck in this “dating” limbo that never seems to change or grow. To have a relationship, you need friendship. If that can’t happen, then it will become an almost relationship.
7. You don’t discuss your feelings
When they make you mad, sad, confused or lonely and you don’t tell them—then it’s most likely going to turn into an almost relationship. If you never talk about your feelings, then how are they supposed to know how you feel about them? If they don’t talk about their feelings, then they probably don’t care enough to do so. There’s a reason these conversations don’t come up and it’s probably because you both aren’t willing to be vulnerable enough. Real relationships take vulnerability.
8. The relationship is mostly physical
You touch, kiss, fuck and even feel as if you’re making love. When you’re physical, it all feels perfect. But, if you don’t have anything more than that, then it’s not going to last. Almost relationships end, because it’s not built on a stable foundation. You can get physical attraction anywhere, but it’s the mental and emotional that makes you stay.
9. You imagine them as you want them to be, instead of who they are
In your head, you’re picturing them as treating you better. You start to dream about how, one day, they may finally be the person you are meant to be with. Your mind goes to these places because you’re not satisfied with the reality of them. They will always be better in your mind than in front of your eyes.
10. You are unhappy with them
Ultimately, the reason relationships don’t work out is because you both aren’t right for each other. If you’re unhappy about the lack of communication, no label, distance, and feelings of uncertainty then you should end it. It’s going to end eventually, anyway. You deserve someone who’s going to be sure that they want you. You deserve someone that you are sure of as well. Don’t ever settle for less.