Even being in a relationship does not guarantee that your confidence will increase, especially if you struggle with low confidence. It is easy to think that having someone who loves you will cure your confidence issues, but it does not work like that. However, if you work on it, you will be able to be secure enough in yourself to help your confidence in a relationship. Here’s how you can cope with being insecure in a relationship.
1. Write down your positive traits
It can be difficult to understand why someone loves you in a romantic way. You may not feel adequate, whether it is physically, intellectually, or otherwise. This can lead to not believing compliments from your partner. Whenever you have doubts about why your partner loves you, write down five things that are amazing about you. Add to this list regularly. You are absolutely worthy of being loved and you are enough, and seeing your best qualities in a visual way helps you realize this.
2. Ensure that you have room to be independent
Having room to be independent allows you to have the freedom to explore things on your own and to develop your strengths in an individual way. Being able to conquer new things on your own will make you feel like you can do anything you set your mind to without having to lean on someone, which will allow your confidence to grow. This confidence will overflow into your relationship, which will help you and your partner grow closer together.
3. Stop comparing your current relationship to past relationships
If your past relationships hurt you deeply or ended with the blame put on you, it can be easy to be worried that it will happen again in your current relationship. This will only leave you walking on broken glass around your partner, which is not fair to the other person. While it is important that you learned from previous relationships, it is crucial that you keep an open mind in your current relationship. If you still need to work out the hurt from your past, maybe it is best to end your relationship and focus on you.
4. Communicate with your partner
Honesty is crucial, and if you are feeling low in confidence on a particular day or your partner points it out, tell them how you feel. They deserve to know how you feel or why you do what you do. Communication is a key feature of any relationship, and it has the power to take your relationship even deeper than before, making it even more important when you’re feeling insecure in a relationship. The other person will appreciate that you were open and honest, and the two of you can talk about solutions for the future.
5. Prevent your imagination from going directly to the worst-case scenarios
If you make a mistake in a relationship or you feel like you said the wrong thing, it can be easy for your imagination to automatically jump to the conclusion that your relationship is over, even if it is not the case. Every time you feel like your imagination is wandering down the path of worst-case scenarios, redirect it to think about everything that can go right. Training your brain to do this automatically will take time, but it can be done.
Have you ever felt insecure in a relationship? How did you cope with it? Let us know in the comments!
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Ashley is a recent graduate from Temple University in Philadelphia, PA with her Bachelor's in journalism. She love writing articles about music and Philadelphia. Ashley would love to pursue a career in journalism in New York City.