As we get older, losing relationships and drifting away from certain people is inevitable. We grow as people and sometimes that means we change and aren’t as compatible with our friends as we used to be, even our best friends. Being able to maturely deal with drifting apart from a best friend is important and necessary. Here are some ways to help you when your friendship isn’t the same as it was.
Ask How They Feel
In life, it’s easy to get caught up in your own things like work, relationships, and becoming who you want to be. Checking in with your friends may not be the first thing on your daily or even weekly tasks. Asking your best friend how they have been feeling about the friendship is the first step in seeing where you stand, and if you’ll even continue to stay friends. Being mature and honest about how you feel is crucial and will really help you and your best friend be on the same page.
Sometimes people change and aren’t the same person they used to be when you became friends or were super close. It’s hard to accept but it’s the truth. You and your bestie might not vibe as well as you used to and sometimes it can just be easier to agree that the friendship isn’t like it used to be, and that is okay. It’s also okay to admit that the best years of your friendship may be gone.
Assess How You Feel
Knowing how you feel about the friendship is a key step when addressing why you are drifting away. You need to understand why this person was/is your best friend and what has changed to make you feel the way you do. It’s critical to focus on yourself and not completely blame the other person if there is something you feel that you could have done to make yourself feel this way.
Being honest with yourself about how you feel will open your eyes and give you a clear head when talking to your best friend about everything. This can be a step in the right direction for you and your bestie. It can really be a turning point in your friendship.
Try To Rekindle The Friendship
Having a dinner date, shopping day, or sleepover movie night with your best friend can give you the chance to rekindle your friendship. Talking about old memories and good times can bring to light the reason you became friends in the first place. You can avoid drifting away from your best friend even more and reverse the way you and your bestie have been feeling. Plus, who doesn’t love a good girls night with their best friend?
It can be hard to make time for your friends if you have a busy schedule so plan in advance and show them that you are willing to make time for them. This can change the course of your friendship and be beneficial for both you and your best friend. If you both put in the effort to make your friendship work, there is really nothing standing in your way.
Focus On The Good
Focusing on all the good times you and your best friend have had can bring the friendship right back to where it was. Focus on all the things you’ve done together and all the places you’ve been. You’ve told each other your best kept secrets and biggest fears and that should really mean something. Keep the good times in the back of your mind while you’re trying to rekindle your friendship and don’t let negativity keep you down.
This can help you keep the friendship going or keep the fond memories if your friendship had to end.
If there is tension in your friendship, talk about it. Sit down with your best friend and really have a heart to heart. Express your feelings to them and let them openly express theirs to you. Friendships are about give and take and a healthy friendship requires honesty and attention.
Tension in your relationship with your best friend can ultimately be the end of it. You need to learn how to maturely handle being honest about the way they have made you feel or how you made them feel. You have to be open to listening to their side and give them the chance to voice their feelings. If you truly want your friendship back, you need to learn how to forgive and move on.
Grieving Your Friendship
If for some reason your friendship is beyond repair, it’s okay to feel sad or angry. People drift apart and sometimes there is no bringing them back together or fixing what has been broken. You need to be able to grieve your friendship in a healthy way. You shouldn’t be bitter or revengeful toward the person who was once your best friend, because believe me it isn’t worth it.
You and your best friend should be able to maturely agree that you are no longer the friends that you used to be. Whether that is because one of you changed, both of you changed, or you just aren’t in the same place in life. It can be difficult and heartbreaking, but you’ll make it through. Ending a friendship with maturity and agreement makes it much easier than being resentful and angry towards your previous best friend.
After the loss of a friendship, it can be hard. You should focus on the future and remember that you learned so much from your friendship. Being able to look back on a friendship with admiration and not disappointment is the best feeling, even though the friendship had to end. This can really help you grow as a person and teach you how to be a better friend in the future.