There is a battle happening in society right now where we are pinned against ourselves. When you trying to find your inner beauty you will see society has imposed obstacles because tragically they have become obsessed with the outer one. We are constantly being bombarded by messages, both explicit and subliminal, that our outer beauty is exceedingly more important than our inner one, that how much we weigh or whether our thighs touch or not is much more important than our goals, passions, and ambition. In order to break away at the barriers holding us back from reaching our potential, we must take ourselves by the hand, nurture our truest self, and let our inner beauty shine.
1. Remember What Makes You Uniquely You
In this journey to self-love, it is essential that you get to know the person who has been there for you everyday, yourself. You have gotten yourself through life’s many ups and at times devastating downs, so it’s time to recognize that power within. Make a list of some of your favorite characteristics, you’re kind, you’re a loving friend, you recycle…as much as you can. Recognizing these inner attributes that make you uniquely you is the perfect catalyst to sparking that self-love.
Your inner beauty is made up of so many specific and stunning parts so take the time to get to know them. Take yourself on dates, tend to your wants and needs; if you give that type of attention to Carlos from Hinge just imagine how much of that love and attention you deserve!
2. Spring Cleaning
When your precious brain is constantly being bombarded by these messages that you have to be thinner, curvier, more white, less white it starts to take an immense toll on how you treat yourself and others. It’s time to do a spring cleaning of the mind! See how you talk to yourself during the day. See how certain situations made you feel- angry, sad, mad or happy and take the time to nurture the latter. Whatever thoughts and hurtful societal standards you decided to push on yourself it’s time to let them go! Out with the old and in with the new.
See what comments, habits or thoughts hurt you and start editing so you can get to that healthy space where your inner beauty has always been. When you start dismantling all those societal pressures and toxicity your finally giving yourself the room to breathe and grow!
3. Decide What Comes In And What Goes Out
Whether it be people irl or on IG- delete what doesn’t make you happy! You have an entire life ahead of you and you shouldn’t waste it on comparing and despairing, as much as some advertisers would love you to. That inner beauty can’t shine when you’re blocking it in with pictures of what you think you should look like or images of how the world thinks you should dress. You love your purple Creepers with hot pink socks then rock it. Own it. When you step into yourself you show others that they can too.
Get rid of the people who make you feel like you have to or want to be someone else. Change the algorithm of your Instagram and your mind.
4. Curate A Safe Space
Do the things that make you feel the most authentic version of yourself! Nurture the hobbies that make you feel aligned, the water-coloring that gives you the time to see the beauty in every shape and color. The places that make you feel at home or the places that make your heart and mind skip a beat. Go to those places and you’ll see how that inner beauty feels more and more courageous to come out and see the world!
Your space has a lot of influence over your mood so if you do one thing on the daily to curate that space you’ll be better for it in the long run. Create a space and life uniquely your own because society doesn’t know you like you do.
5. Be Your Own Best Friend
Would you say that to your best friend? How do you treat your most loved ones? That’s how you should be treating yourself. It’s way easier said than done but damnit it’s worth it. You can still have expectations but you aren’t tearing yourself down and your inner beauty along with it. We all have those days where we are our own worst enemies and that’s okay but we also have to be our own best friends.
How would you like it if you knew your bestie was tearing herself down because she had an extra scoop of ice-cream or forget a deadline? You’d be furious because you know she deserves the world and you wished she saw how beautiful she is inside and out. Treat yourself as you’d treat your best friend because you deserve that self-love and affection. Be patient, understanding and loving with yourself because that’s what friends are for.
Shero and self-made mogul Diane Von Furstenberg is quoted saying “when a woman becomes her own best friend life is easier.” The beauty in that quote lies deep. We must all take the time to love ourselves inside and out because that will radiate to everyone we meet and in everything we do. She went on to grace us by saying “the most important relationship in your life is the relationship you have with yourself. Because no matter what happens, you will always be with yourself.” Insert all the snaps!