Go hard or go home. That was my moto the night before world-renowned\u00a0actress Taylor Schilling got to witness me throw up a nights worth of fireball all over my mom’s car.<\/p>\n
It was a hazy afternoon in the depths of Toronto when I started to not feel so hot. As in I am going to throw up right now.<\/p>\n
No, it was not Christmas, New Years or even\u00a0my day of birth. It was battle of the bands at Ryerson University. I was visiting a friend and we decided that going to a hot and smelly amphitheater\u00a0at a university was a great idea.<\/p>\n
There was aggressive\u00a0music and the art scene was incredibly present. In short, I really didn’t want to be there and she did. Wow, am I a good friend.<\/p>\n
As any night goes where there was enough drinking so that I become social I made friends. As my friend was down in the pit I wandered upstairs to use the bathroom. I did not find it.<\/p>\n
I found a sweaty gentleman with a bottle of fireball and a need to share. As I forgot about my wonderful friend down below I attempted to drink enough of this cinnamon\u00a0flavored shit to make the music actually good. And you know maybe make this guy attractive.<\/p>\n
As the battle of the bands ensued so did my drunken stupor. It was about 11 and I wanted to get the hell out of there, so I suggested karaoke to my new friends, we found my lady in the pit and off we went.<\/p>\n
We were near College station in the heart of Toronto looking for a karaoke\u00a0bar, what we found instead was a rundown pub that was so happening doing karaoke.<\/p>\n
When we arrived it was us, a group of women in their 40s and the owner. We were a lively mob and they had a deal on shots. I was in my zone. 30 minutes later I had karaoke\u00a0my heart out and didn’t give many a turn with the mic. As I look at the table next to us the birthday women starts talking to me. Saying how fun we are and how she wishes she was 19 again.<\/p>\n
Before I know it her friends all want to leave but she doesn’t. I suggest that she stay out and party with us which she thinks is a great idea. 4 shots later and a call to her cute son, I was loaded. And my friend was tired, and my new friend was trying to be more than a friend. It was time to leave.<\/p>\n
But birthday women could barely\u00a0move, so we on the brisk walk home had to figure out how to get this random lady to her domain.<\/p>\n
We finally hail her a cab and continue on walking, in the wrong direction. I’m\u00a0belting\u00a0out “I got you baby” as I skip along College at 2 am, talking to anyone who would listen. We get back to the apartment and decide that we are hungry.<\/p>\n
My friend is a vegan and wants tacos so we search Uber eats until we find a vegan place that delivers tacos at almost 4 in the morning.\u00a0The\u00a0tacos arrive and we munch.\u00a0 This is when I remember that I am meeting my mom at 9 am.<\/p>\n
I wake up foggy and confused still in my makeup and the clothes from the night before. I smell like cinnamon, old bar, and sweat. It’s 8:50, I’m\u00a0screwed. I scramble to look half decent and zoom to the lobby with all my stuff and a screaming headache. I see the van and hop in, assuming that I can milk this hangover on the ride and no one would be the wiser.<\/p>\n
As my mom drives like a madwomenI start to feel something deep in my stomach. They have been asking me questions the whole car ride and I have been mumbling responses. I scream “roll down the window”, and my mom and GRANDMA start laughing. The window was rolled once we parked and I projectile vomited all over the side of the rental.<\/p>\n
My mom is laughing and tells me to clean it up, but we don’t have napkins, I respond. She doesn’t care, so I pull out an uh, sanitary napkin and get to work on the side of the van.<\/p>\n
Just then Ms. Taylor Schilling decides to grace us with her presence and looks me dead in the eyes. Doesn’t say a word and goes about her day. The family freaks and decides to follow her into a book store. After we stalk her we decide to leave and just as I turn around to get one last look Taylor Schilling smirks at me.<\/p>\n
Go hard or go home. That was my moto the night before world-renowned\u00a0actress Taylor Schilling got to witness me throw up a nights worth of fireball all over my mom’s car. It was a hazy afternoon in the depths of Toronto when I started to not feel so hot. As in I am going to…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24965,"featured_media":117656,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":true},"categories":[4],"tags":[10693,10694,10695,10696,10697],"thb-sponsors":[],"class_list":["post-117655","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-celebrity","tag-embarrasing-stories","tag-embarrassing-stories","tag-part-life","tag-taylor-schi","tag-taylor-schilling"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n