Below is a list of things you will never hear at Dalhousie University from any student! Enjoy!
1. “There was no line at Tim’s this morning!”
Unless you got to Tim’s in the SUB at 7:30am, there was probably a line. And you’ve probably waited in it for 20 minutes so you could get a coffee before class, only to show up 20 minutes late and miss half the lecture. To make matters worse, your coffee is probably cold, too.
2. “You should live in Howe Hall if all you care about is studying”
Howe is the loudest first-year residence. It is known as the party residence, and almost every week there is a new wall that needs to be re-drywalled and re-painted. On some weekends, residents aren’t even allowed to have guests past 8:00pm. If you think you’ll get that 4.0 by living in Howe, you are so, so wrong.
3. “The walk from the LSC to McCain is the easiest walk ever!”
Sure, if you’re a three-time Olympic athlete who placed first in the 400m every year. Nothing is worse than showing up all sweaty to your English class after sprinting from your lab in the LSC.
4. “Campus is construction-free today”
The Hicks building has been under construction since forever and the Dalplex is getting a new addition to it by 2018. And again, if you want to count fixing broken walls in Howe as construction, there’s that too.
5. “I meet with my tutor multiple times a week, they’ve taught me so much”
I know I’ve used this line before. It sounds really good to your mom, but let’s be real, do you even have a tutor???
6. “I finished all my work early!”
You studied for your Physics midterm, finished that 10 page report, 3 quizzes, CAPA assignments, AND research project 4 days before they are due?! CONGRATULATIONS! (Teach me your ways…)
7. “My cooking is so good even Gordon Ramsay would agree!”
Let’s be honest – I think my Mr. Noodles are better than yours.
8. “I do my laundry at least once a week”
Says the person with two baskets full of dirty laundry sitting in the corner of your residence room. If you’re anything like my friends, you probably haven’t done it since Thanksgiving weekend.
9. “I found a really good parking spot today at 9:00am!”
There is literally no parking anywhere on campus between 8:00am and 4:00pm. Even if you get there before 8:00, say, 7:45, you’ll probably be in a brawl with another “not-a-morning”-person trying to get the spots outside the McCain and beat the line to Tim’s… people who haven’t had their morning coffee are very hard to reason with – remember this.
10. “I wish I went to SMU!”
Saint Mary’s University is Dal’s biggest rival in Halifax. (I just realized a few months ago that it’s Tigers vs. Huskies.. or cats vs. dogs – I now understand the rivalry) While their campus is cute and small, and their field is a little prettier than ours, they don’t have the ocean 300m away, a free student-taxi service, or over 400 student clubs/societies to get involved in.