Summer coming to an end has me thinking about all of the people I’m going to see soon back at school. Temple University has a broad range of students, you never know who you’re going to run into on campus…but you can pretty much guarantee you’ll meet these 10 kinds of people!
1. A cool security guard.
If there ever was a definitive ranking of campuses with the coolest campus officials, Temple would absolutely be #1. Not only do you always feel safe, but they are kind, funny, and will have your back in a pinch (like if you forget your ID 25/7 like me. Yes, 25/7).
2. That person who is always in the shower.
I can understand never truly feeling clean in a dorm bathroom, but for some inexplicable reason there always seems to be one person constantly in the shower. Some days, you see this person in the shower three or four times within 24 hours. This person is also incredibly nice, so you feel terrible judging their super cleanliness.
Some days, when the stars align and all’s right with the universe, you will run into Hooter the Owl in full dress. For someone walking around in what looks like an unbearably uncomfortable costume, they’re super chill. Hooter will pretty much always return a high five/wave or stop for a selfie.
4. The one who’s OBSESSED with Cosi.
Cosi has a WAY with Temple students. It could be the elusive but delicious free bread, the artisan pizzas, or the air of “I’m super deep and good to my body”–who knows? For me, it’s the squagel. I looooooove me a squagel. You will certainly find that one friend in your group who cannot stay away. Who hoards meal swipes just to splurge on some melts, soups, and salads. Saturdays get pretty dismal for this person since that’s the only day they are closed.
5. The one who doesn’t live with you but is over often enough that they basically do.
Now I know this one sounds generic, but I promise you I can name at least seven people who fit into this category without even trying. Temple students are friendly, for the most part. We like to make our fellow Owls feel at home. So much so that they never go back to their own homes. Ever. You start to wonder if they even have anywhere else to go. They’re at your floor meetings (usually before you get there), are besties with the RA, and feel comfortable walking into anyone’s room. One of my friends was on our floor so often that he had no problem moving in the following semester.
6. That Morgan Hall resident we’re a bit jealous of (not that we’ll ever admit it).
Morgan North and South are swanky. Okay? It has to be said. Suite style dorm-partments, with living areas and kitchens and TVs and OKAY it’s super nice, we get it. This person will tirelessly bring up the fact that they live in Morgan and talk about how wonderful it is and blah blah blah. Just because those halls are straight out of HGTV does not mean they’re better than you or me. They just live better than you or me.
(note: Not all Morgan hall-ers are like this, but you will surely meet that ONE.)
7. That one person who will defend Sheetz to the end of days.
There is nothing you can say to this person. I’m serious. There is no Sheetz near Temple’s main campus, and they will never not be upset about it.
8. That other person who will fight to the death for Wawa.
There is also nothing you can say to this person. They are equally upset that there is no Wawa near Temple’s main campus. Much like Lord Voldemort, Wawarriors have placed a curse on Temple for refusing to build one.
9. The person who must become a mediator for the inevitable confrontation between Sheetz and Wawa.
I am from New York City, where neither of these establishments exist. If you’re like me, you wind up being a #9. Since Temple is in Pennsylvania and close to Jersey, the rivalry between Sheetz and Wawa gets intense on main campus. You thought Game of Thrones’ Battle of the Bastards was a good fight? Once #7 and #8 get in a room together, forget about it. Your weekend plans are shot. You gotta just prepare to referee the impending showdown for chain convenience stores. Or are they markets? Delis? I don’t know, man. Show me a Duane Reade.
10. The one who seems to not own any clothes that are not Temple gear.
This person may not even be that big on school spirit. Temple just gives out a ton of free shirts. I stole like seven from our opening football game. Luckily, cherry (not red, it’s CHERRY), white, and black look good on everybody.
What other kinds of people are you guaranteed to see at Temple University…or more importantly, are you one of these peeps??
Featured photo source: youtube.com
Satchel was born and raised in Brooklyn, NY, sharing a birthday with Beyoncé/the Queen. She is currently pursuing theater as her major with minors in music and digital media technologies. She has a love for fantasy television, wokeness, Daveed Diggs of Hamilton, and red velvet cupcakes.